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just-aake · 19 hours ago

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Detecting Love Part 3

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader

Summary: Part 3 to Detecting Love. Sometimes being able to see lies isn't the only way to know the truth.

Part 1 | Part 2

Warnings: fluff, light angst, slight violence

Words: 6011

Everybody lies.

It’s a skill everyone picks up from the moment they understand the world around them—instinctive, reflexive, necessary.

Some might even say it’s the glue that holds society together, smoothing out interactions, saving feelings, keeping secrets.

Because lying is one of the surest ways to get what they want.

And when you’re the one person who can see every lie, it means you’re also the one possible thing standing in the way of what they want.

Your power has been with you for as long as you can remember, an ever-present weight you’ve learned to carry. You’ve adjusted, adapted, built your life around it. Every conversation, every interaction—filtered through the crimson glow of deception that only you can see.

But “seeing” is the crucial part of your ability.

Which is why, at this moment, stripped of your sight, you find yourself completely at Natasha’s mercy.

The soft cloth tied around your eyes steals your vision, replacing the world with darkness. You lean back against the armrest of the sofa, letting yourself sink into the plush cushions, the absence of sight sharpening your other senses.

A soft rustling sound. The clink of items being placed on the coffee table. Then, the telltale shift of weight as Natasha settles onto the sofa beside you.

You reach out blindly, fingers stretching toward where you think she is. There’s a shift—so subtle, so deliberate—and instead of warm skin, your fingertips grasp at nothing but air.

Your hand drops onto the cushion with a quiet huff.

“You know,” you mutter, tilting your head in her direction, “this isn’t exactly what I imagined when you asked if you could blindfold me.”

A melodic chuckle answers you, warm and teasing.

And then, a gentle touch—her hand finding yours, fingers sliding between yours in a slow, deliberate motion. The heat of her palm against your own sends a small thrill up your spine.

And then she tugs.

You’re pulled forward, your balance shifting unexpectedly. Your free hand instinctively reaches out, fingers splaying against the back of the sofa just in time to steady yourself.

The sudden proximity makes your breath hitch.

Even without sight, you can feel her—warmth radiating from her body, the faint scent of something so distinctly her lingering in the air between you.

The soft exhale of breath ghosts over your lips.

And finally, the press of her mouth against yours.

It’s slow at first, a testing, teasing thing. A mere brush of lips, then another.

You hum in approval, leaning in to deepen the kiss, but just as you begin to chase the sensation, she pulls away—just enough to be out of reach.

You frown, lips still parted.

A quiet chuckle rumbles from just beside you, her presence shifting slightly as she dodges out of the way.

“Was that what you were thinking about?” Natasha’s voice is playful, laced with amusement.

You chuckle, shaking your head slightly.

“More or less,” you admit, voice low. You tilt forward again, intent on finding her.

Only to be met with empty space.

You sigh in exasperation, lips jutting out in an exaggerated pout.

Natasha’s quiet laughter follows, rich and teasing, a warm contrast to your supposed frustration.

Then, she shifts, as smooth and quiet as the expert spy she is.

A presence—suddenly close, just beside your ear, and a breath of warmth that sends a subtle shiver down your spine.

“Unfortunately,” she murmurs, her voice dripping with amusement, “I did have something else planned first.”

Before you can react, a gentle but firm nudge pushes you back into your original position. You huff in mock protest, but there’s no real resistance.

Instead, you settle back against the sofa, patience threading through your posture as you listen to the subtle sounds of movement—the rustle of fabric, the soft clink of utensils, the faint scrape of ceramic against wood.

Then, Natasha speaks again.

“Open up.”

A brow arches instinctively, curiosity flickering in the absence of sight, but you obey nonetheless. Lips parting slightly, you wait.

The moment the food touches your tongue, you process the flavors—unexpected, slightly off balance, but not bad exactly.

You chew thoughtfully, trying to find the right words, as you now realize why Natasha had spent the last few hours in your kitchen while also forbidding you from entering the area.

“Mmm, oh, that’s…that was, uh…that tasted pretty good.”

A beat of silence. Then, a soft exhale, barely containing amusement.

“You’re a terrible liar,” Natasha states flatly.

You grin, tilting your head in her direction, unbothered at being caught.

“Hey, between the two of us, who’s the one who can actually prove whether I’m lying?”

A featherlight touch brushes against your cheek—at the edge of the blindfold, her fingers tracing along the fabric. Then, a low chuckle, close and intimate.

“Right now,” she murmurs, “I’d say my odds are better than yours.”

You roll your eyes behind the blindfold, a grin still tugging at your lips.

“Alright, Romanoff, what’s next?”

There’s a slight pause before you hear her retrieve another bite-sized offering from the table. Then, once again—

“Open up.”

You oblige, and the moment the different food hits your tongue, a genuine hum of appreciation escapes you.

“Oh, wow. That’s actually really tasty.”

You don’t need your sight to know she’s suspicious. It’s in the split second of silence, the charged pause that follows your reaction.

Then—an offended scoff and a shove against your shoulder. It’s light and playful but enough to push you back slightly.

You react on instinct. Before she can retreat, your hand darts out, fingers wrapping around her wrist.

A surprised inhale escapes her as you tug—not forceful, just enough to unbalance her.

The next thing you know, she’s half on your lap, her weight settling against you as she catches herself with her hands on your shoulders.

For a moment, there’s only stillness. Warmth pressing against warmth, shared breaths mingling in the space between.

“I’m not lying,” you say softly, your voice steady with sincerity.

You tilt your head slightly, aligning with where you think her face is, wishing—just for a second—that you could see her.

But then, she moves.

Her hands rise, cupping your face gently, her palms warm against your skin. A second later, her forehead presses against yours, grounding you in the closeness of the moment.

“I know,” Natasha whispers.

And you believe her.

A part of you aches to look into her eyes, to see the truth in them. To witness firsthand the way her gaze would soften, the way the world itself would fade in the presence of her unwavering adoration.

But the blindfold remains—a barrier, yet somehow making every other sensation sharper, more visceral.

You exhale, a slow, teasing smile forming.

“Not that I’m complaining,” you murmur, “but was the blindfold really necessary for this?”

There’s a slight shift with Natasha turning her head from you as if debating whether to admit something.

“Trust me,” Natasha mutters, her voice lower, more conspiratorial. “My cooking has gotten to the point where it may be somewhat edible, but the presentation definitely needs some work.”

A quiet chuckle rumbles in your throat.

She shifts again, her nose grazing against yours now, a barely-there touch that sends a flutter through your chest.

And then, in the smallest of murmurs, as her lips brush yours.

“Plus,” she whispers, the words melting into your skin, “I could do this.”

Just as you anticipate the full press of her lips, the warmth vanishes.

You lean forward instinctively, chasing after the kiss that never lands. Your breath stirs the space between you, lips parting slightly in expectation, but Natasha has already moved away.

A quiet chuckle—low and knowing—echoes from a different angle now, just slightly off from where she had been before.

Your brow furrows.

“You’re playing dirty,” you mutter, tilting your head as if that might help you locate her.

Another soft laugh. Then—

A featherlight kiss at the corner of your jaw.

Your breath catches, but before you can react, she’s gone again, retreating before you can pinpoint her exact position.

You turn slightly in the direction of the touch, but then—

A kiss, just beneath your ear.

It’s brief, teasing, her lips barely making contact before they disappear again. Your fingers twitch at your sides, itching to catch her, to pull her back where you want her.

Then—

A press of warmth at the hollow of your throat.

Your exhale stutters, heat curling low in your stomach. You tilt your chin up, attempting to track her movements, but Natasha is already gone, shifting to another spot before you can react.

Then, a whisper, her breath fanning over your collarbone—so close but maddeningly out of reach.

“Having trouble, detka?”

You let out a quiet growl of frustration, reaching blindly in her direction, but she slips past your grasp once again. Your pulse pounds beneath your skin, every teasing press of her lips winding you tighter, pushing you further into a mix of heat and exasperation.

“I swear to God, Romanoff—”

Her laugh is like silk and fire, smooth but entirely too pleased with itself.

Another kiss, this time against the side of your throat. A sharp inhale escapes you, but before you can turn toward her, she’s gone again.

Your hands finally shoot up, reaching out in the dark, determined to catch her this time.

But Natasha is faster.

A whisper of movement, the ghost of her presence shifting away just before your fingers can close around her.

Your head falls back against the sofa, a frustrated groan escaping your lips.

“I really hate you right now.”

She hums in amusement, the sound vibrating against your skin as she hovers close, just beyond reach.

“No, you don’t,” she counters easily, seeing through your lie.

You exhale sharply, trying to school your breathing.

“Debatable,” you grumble, though you know a red aura is probably around you at the moment.

Warm hands suddenly cradle your jaw, fingers tracing along your skin with deliberate tenderness.

You barely have time to process the shift before she finally, finally presses her lips fully against yours, capturing you in a slow, intoxicating kiss.

The tension in your body melts instantly, frustration replaced by the relief of having her exactly where you want her. Your hands find her waist this time, pulling her in with no intention of letting her slip away again.

When she eventually pulls back, just enough to break the kiss but still close enough that your breaths mingle, she smirks against your lips.

“See?” she murmurs. “The blindfold was necessary.”

You shake your head with a breathless laugh, fingers tightening at her sides.

“You’re insufferable.”

“And yet, you’re still hopelessly in love with me.”

You sigh dramatically at the truth of her words.

“Yeah, yeah. Now kiss me properly already.”

This time, when she does, she doesn’t pull away.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

The steady hum of the AC sends another chill through the room, making you shiver involuntarily. Rubbing your hands together for warmth, you glance down at the document in front of you before shifting your gaze to the woman sitting across your desk.

“You want to transfer to another department?” you ask, scanning the request form. “Are you sure?”

The woman nods without hesitation—at least, on the surface.

“It’s been weeks since our break-up, but he’s still trying to get me to take him back,” she explains, frustration laced in her tone. “It’s getting to the point where I can’t get anything done without him hovering over my shoulder.”

Your frown deepens, arms crossing as you lean forward slightly.

“Do you actually want to leave your department?”

For a split second, there’s a flicker of hesitation, a moment where her expression wavers. Then, in a much quieter voice, she mumbles, “Yes.”

And there it is.

The red glow appears instantly, surrounding her like a warning flare only you can see. A lie—one spoken more to convince herself than anyone else.

You sigh, setting the paper down.

“Look,” you say gently, “if he’s harassing you, you shouldn’t be the one who has to uproot your life to avoid him.” You meet her gaze firmly, making sure she understands. “Let me talk to him. If he still won’t leave you alone, I’ll transfer him to a different facility. Does that sound okay?”

She hesitates. Then, a slight nod.

No red glow this time.

Instead, relief crosses her face, and you nod in confirmation.

“Alright. That’s what we’ll do.”

She thanks you quickly, standing and heading toward the door. As you turn in your chair to discard the request form, you hear a sudden, surprised gasp.

Then, almost shyly, a mumbled greeting before hurried footsteps scurry away.

Without looking, you already know why.

“Everything okay?”

Natasha’s voice fills the room, smooth and unmistakable.

You glance back to see her stepping inside, the door clicking shut behind her as she gestures over her shoulder.

“That’s the third time I’ve seen her in your office this week.”

A teasing smirk tugs at your lips when you realize she’s been taking note of such things. You lean forward, elbows resting on your desk.

“Are you jealous?”

Natasha rolls her eyes, unimpressed. Without hesitation, she tosses the hoodie in her hands straight at your face, hitting you squarely.

You let out a muffled laugh, peeling the fabric away.

“Don’t tease me,” she warns playfully, settling against the edge of your desk. “Especially after I took the time to bring this to you.”

You hum in amusement, slipping on the hoodie. Immediately, warmth envelops you, and with it, her familiar, comforting scent.

Natasha watches as you sink into the hoodie’s embrace, snuggling into the fabric like it’s second nature. There’s a pause before she quirks a brow.

“How come you keep forgetting to bring your own?”

You glance up, smirk never faltering.

“Because I love yours so much.”

She scoffs, shaking her head, but the slight smile curling at the corner of her lips betrays any real irritation. Her gaze flickers downward as she plucks the paper smoothly from your hand.

“A transfer?” she muses, raising a brow.

You exhale, leaning back into your chair.

“Just some workplace romance drama.”

Your fingers find their way to her thigh, tracing slow, idle circles against the fabric of her pants.

“You know how relationships between coworkers always get complicated.”

Natasha smirks, tilting her head slightly.

“Is there something you’re trying to say here?”

You grin, about to tease her further, but a sharp beep interrupts the moment.

Natasha pulls out her comm device, checking it briefly before shutting it off with a sigh.

“I have to go,” she murmurs. “The team’s probably already at the hangar by now.”

“A new mission?”

She nods.

“Shouldn’t take too long. I’ll probably be back for dinner.”

A playful look of apprehension crosses your face.

“Oh, uh…did you want to try cooking again tonight, or—?”

She shoves your shoulder lightly, making you laugh as she huffs in faux irritation, crossing her arms.

Still grinning, you scoot closer, uncrossing her arms just so you can hold her hands instead.

“I’m kidding,” you assure her. “I’ll wait for you to come back, and we can make something together. Sound good?”

Natasha exhales, her faux annoyance melting away into something softer. She nods, giving you a brief eye-roll before letting you hold onto her hands.

“Alright.”

You squeeze her fingers gently, tugging them slightly so she focuses on you again. Your thumb glides over the back of her hand in slow, soothing strokes. Then, the words leave your lips, unfiltered and true.

“I love you.”

It’s soft—barely more than a whisper—but woven with every ounce of affection you feel for her.

Her eyes search yours, something flickering behind her gaze. Then, she lifts a hand to your cheek, her thumb brushing along your skin as she leans in.

The kiss is slow, lingering, and warm. Careful in a way that makes your chest ache.

When she pulls back, she hovers close enough that you can still feel her breath against your lips.

Her mouth parts slightly as if she wants to say something—as if she wants to say it back.

Your heart hammers at the thought, and for the first time, instead of fear, a surge of anticipation appears within you—to hear those words fall from her lips.

But she doesn’t say them.

The moment stretches, charged with something unspoken. And then, you exhale softly, filling the silence with your own quiet plea.

“Stay safe, okay?”

Natasha’s expression softens. A small, knowing smile lifts the corner of her lips as she whispers back, “You too.”

She squeezes your hand again before pulling away, slipping effortlessly back into her composed exterior. As she heads for the door, you watch her go, the warmth of her touch still lingering in your hands.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

“I swear I didn’t go near her this whole week.”

You barely suppress the sigh threatening to escape as you lean back in your chair, watching the man across from you. He sits rigidly, hands clasped together on the desk, his face carefully composed. But it doesn’t matter how well he masks his emotions.

Because the truth is written all over him. Or rather, it glows.

A constant red aura surrounds him, pulsing faintly as he continues to defend himself. His voice is smooth, and his delivery is nearly flawless—he might have been able to convince someone else if he had to. Maybe even turn the situation in his favor.

Too bad he has to face you instead.

You drum your fingers lightly against the desk, exhaling quietly. You’ve heard enough.

Rubbing your temple in exasperation, you make your decision.

“Alright,” you say, keeping your tone measured but firm. “I think the best option right now is to create some distance between you two. Why don’t you take some time off for yourself? And in the meantime, I’ll arrange for your transfer to another department.”

His expression tightens. “But—”

“That wasn’t a suggestion.”

Your voice cuts through his protest, cool and unwavering. You straighten in your chair, leveling him with a stare.

“Either you take the transfer,” you continue, “or you can gather your things and leave the Compound entirely. Your choice.”

For the first time in the conversation, his composure cracks. His brows furrow, lips parting slightly as if he’s struggling to process that you aren’t buying a single word of his defense. He looks at you as if searching for an opening, a way to manipulate the situation in his favor.

But you aren’t giving him one.

After a long moment, his jaw clenches. Then, reluctantly, he nods.

“Fine,” he mutters.

You nod once in return, already mentally filing the necessary paperwork to have him reassigned.

“Good. I’ll have the details sent to you by the end of the day.”

The meeting ends, and he leaves, his steps heavy with frustration. You watch him go, feeling a faint sense of relief that, at the very least, the situation will be handled.

It’s late by the time you make your way toward one of the labs. Most of the Compound has quieted down, the usual hum of activity reduced to only a few lingering agents and late-night researchers.

You had planned to leave for the night since it’ll still be a few hours before Natasha returns, but something nagged at you—an instinct, maybe.

A feeling that you should check in before heading out.

As you approach the lab, muffled voices filter through the partially open door. One is quiet and tense. The other is lower, insistent.

You frown.

Pushing the door open, your eyes narrow at the sight before you.

The woman who had come to you earlier stands backed into a corner, shoulders hunched as she clutches a tablet to her chest.

The man—the same man you had just ordered to take some time away—looms over her, his stance rigid with barely restrained frustration.

“I just want to talk,” he presses, voice strained with forced patience. “You don’t have to act like I’m some kind of monster—”

“That’s far enough.” Your voice cuts through the air, sharp and cold.

Both of them turn.

The woman’s eyes widen slightly in relief while the man’s expression darkens. He straightens, schooling his features into something less aggressive, something more controlled.

“This isn’t what it looks like,” he exhales, clearly displeased to see you again. “She agreed to meet up with me.”

The red glow appears around him once again, and you internally groan at his constant attempts at lying to you.

You step forward between them, pushing the woman back behind you as you face the man with your arms crossed.

“I gave you two options. This wasn’t one of them.”

His jaw tenses as his eyes flicker in suspicion between the two of you. A subtle anger forms in his expression. Then, in a flash of movement, he lunges with a punch.

You react quickly, your hand shooting out and grabbing his arm in a vice grip. With a sharp pivot of your body, you use his own momentum against him—slamming him onto a nearby table with a heavy thud.

He groans, winded but still struggling.

“Stay down,” you growl.

But he doesn’t listen.

His other hand scrambles blindly, knocking over a tray of glass vials before grabbing something solid. Before you can react, he slams the tray into the side of your head.

The impact sends a wave of pain through your skull, sharp and searing. Shards of broken glass cut into your skin, and something cold, almost slick, drips down your face.

You stagger back slightly but force yourself to recover and move.

With a burst of strength, you throw a roundhouse kick, your boot connecting solidly with his chest.

The impact sends him sprawling to the floor, where he stays motionless, unconscious.

For a moment, all you can hear is the ragged sound of your own breathing.

Then, the burning starts.

A sharp, stinging sensation spreads from where the liquid seeps into your skin, trailing down into your eyes. It burns, an unfamiliar heat that makes your vision swim.

You press a hand to your forehead, blinking rapidly to try and clear your sight, but the pain doesn’t subside, and your vision becomes even more distorted.

The woman rushes over, worry painted all over her face. “Are you—oh my God, you’re bleeding—”

“I’m fine. Just call the medic team,” you grit out, even as your head pounds with each pulse of your heartbeat.

Despite the pain, one thought drifts sluggishly through your mind.

Natasha is not going to like this when she gets back.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

“Is this going to take much longer?”

You sit perched on the edge of one of the medical bay beds, an ice pack pressed gingerly against the side of your head. The cool sensation numbs the dull throb beneath your fingertips, but the sting in your eyes remains persistent.

Dr. Cho, standing, you assume, at the other end of the room, hums in thought.

“Depends,” she responds. “Can you open your eyes fully without struggling?”

Your eyelids flutter slightly as you make an attempt, but the moment they part, an intense burning sensation forces them shut again. You exhale through your nose, frustration bubbling beneath the surface.

“It’s just that I have dinner plans tonight,” you explain, shifting slightly in your seat. “So I really need to be home sooner rather than later.”

Dr. Cho pauses briefly before revealing, “I’ve already informed Agent Romanoff. She’ll be here shortly to assist you home.”

Your mouth parts in betrayal.

“What happened to patient-doctor confidentiality?” you ask, turning toward where you think she is.

Before she can answer, another voice emerges from the doorway—low, edged with quiet challenge.

“Were you going to try and hide what happened to you from me?”

Your back straightens instinctively at the sound of Natasha’s voice.

Your mind scrambles for a defense, but all that escapes is an unconvincing response.

“Wha–I uh…of course not.”

Footsteps approach—calculated, steady. Then, before you can react, a warm hand cups your cheek, fingers tracing gently over your skin. Another hand, softer but firm, wraps around your own, carefully prying the ice pack away from your head. The loss of the cool compress makes you wince slightly, but the warmth of her touch quickly replaces the sensation.

Under her breath, Natasha mutters, “Terrible liar.”

You huff a small laugh.

“Hey, you can’t be mean to me. I’m injured here.”

An amused exhale leaves her lips, and though you can’t see it, you can feel the way her expression softens. Then, a slight shift as Natasha turns away from you.

“Why can’t she open her eyes?” she asks, her tone dipping into something firmer, more concerned.

There’s a shuffling of papers before Dr. Cho answers.

“Her optic nerves were affected by exposure to a trial serum during the fight. The blunt trauma to the head certainly isn’t helping, either.”

Natasha sighs, irritation laced in the sound. Her fingers find the ice pack again, pressing it gently back to the side of your head. You flinch slightly at the contact before your hands instinctively reach for her waist, tugging her closer as you rest your head lightly against her shoulder.

“You should train more on not leaving an easy opening for them to hit you like this,” she mutters, the words tinged with quiet frustration.

You chuckle, tilting your head slightly.

“Let’s not forget that I still took him down while blinded.”

Natasha huffs, exasperated, but she doesn’t push you away. Instead, she shifts her focus back to Dr. Cho.

“So what can we do to help her?”

There’s a sound of rustling before footsteps approach.

“These eyedrops should help alleviate the pain and speed up the recovery process of the serum’s effects,” Dr. Cho explains.

“What effects?” Natasha asks in concern.

You can practically feel the tension in her body, the way her muscles tighten subtly beneath your touch.

Dr. Cho hesitates momentarily before answering, “We’re not exactly sure yet. The serum is still in its trial phase. But based on what we know, whatever effects there are should be temporary.”

Before Natasha can question the doctor further, you sigh dramatically.

“Alright, let’s get this over with,” you say, making a grabbing motion in the air, hoping someone will hand you the drops.

A hand—undoubtedly Natasha’s—swats yours down before setting the ice pack aside next to you.

“Hold still,” she murmurs.

You feel her fingers cup your cheek again, tilting your face up slightly. Then, with gentle precision, she coaxes your eyelids apart.

Cool liquid drops into your eyes, and immediately, a wave of relief washes over the burning sensation. A slow exhale leaves your lips as she repeats the process for the other eye.

It takes a few moments before the sting fully subsides. Your eyes remain shut as you wait for the discomfort to fade entirely. Then, cautiously, you let your eyelids flutter open.

The blurriness makes you blink rapidly, adjusting to the light of the room. The familiar shapes of the medical bay start to take form, Natasha’s figure sharpening before you.

But something isn’t right.

Your breath stutters slightly, eyes darting around as an unsettling sensation creeps into your chest.

Natasha notices your hesitation immediately.

“What’s wrong?” she asks, her voice steady but edged with concern.

You hesitate, your pulse picking up as your mind tries to make sense of what you’re seeing. Your brows furrow as you rub at your eyes, but when you look again, it’s still the same.

Her hands come up again, cupping your face, grounding you. Her warmth steadies your frantically beating heart.

“Talk to me,” she murmurs, softer now. “What’s wrong?”

You exhale deeply, your gaze locking onto hers.

Then, quietly, you whisper,

“Everything’s gray.”

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

You stare at the food on your plate, moving it around aimlessly with your fork. The once-vibrant colors that usually make a meal feel inviting are gone, leaving behind a dull-tinted palette.

Dr. Cho explained that the serum must have affected the nerves responsible for transmitting color signals to your brain. Thankfully, she assured you that the condition would be temporary. Unfortunately, she couldn’t say how long it would take for your eyes to fully recover.

Days? Weeks? Longer?

The uncertainty gnaws at you, making you lose even more of your appetite.

“You know,” Natasha’s voice cuts through your thoughts, calm and casual, “we could still order some takeout.”

You blink, looking up to see her sitting across from you, elbow propped on the table as she watches you.

“You don’t have to force yourself to eat that,” she adds, already reaching for your plate.

Your instincts kick in. Quickly, you maneuver your plate out of her reach, eyes narrowing in challenge.

“I like eating the meals you make me,” you say firmly. Then, to drive your point home, you take a large bite.

The moment the food hits your tongue, warmth spreads across your taste buds. Then, heat. A slow, creeping burn.

Your eyes widen slightly as the realization sinks in—it’s spicy. Uncomfortably spicy.

You cough lightly, reaching hastily for your water. Natasha watches calmly as you take a few gulps before finally catching your breath.

Swallowing hard, you manage to look back at her with as much composure as you can muster.

“See?” you rasp. “It’s not bad.”

Natasha doesn’t say anything at first. Just watches. Then, slowly, a soft smile tugs at the corners of her lips as she rests her chin against her hand, a look of undeniable fondness in her eyes.

“Liar,” she mutters, amused.

The teasing tone makes you want to smile—until your gaze drops to your hands.

Your colorless hands. You turn them slowly, searching. Looking for the familiar glow—the telltale red aura that has always been there whenever someone lies.

But there’s nothing. An unease tightens in your chest.

“How can you tell?” you whisper before you even realize you’ve spoken the thought aloud.

“What do you mean?” Natasha asks.

You lift your head, meeting her eyes.

“How can you tell that someone is lying?”

For a moment, she simply looks at you, expression unreadable. Then, something shifts in her gaze—understanding.

“Years of training and spy work help in that field,” she says, her tone light as she gives you a small smile.

You exhale slowly, the weight of everything settling heavily on your shoulders.

“I’ve had my powers my entire life,” you murmur. “Now that I can’t use them…it feels terrifying.”

Natasha listens quietly and attentively.

“How does someone live like this?” you continue, voice barely above a whisper. “Not knowing whether someone is telling the truth or not?”

Silence fills the room. The weight of the question lingers between you, and for a second, you regret bringing it up.

But before you can brush it off, Natasha speaks.

“Sometimes,” she says gently, “we just have to trust our instincts.”

You glance up, skeptical, but she isn’t finished.

“Other times,” she continues, gesturing toward you, “there are things we just know are true.”

Your brows furrow slightly, but she holds your gaze with quiet certainty.

“It’s how I know you’re telling the truth every time you say you love me,” she murmurs.

She pauses for a brief second before offering you a soft smile.

“I can feel how true it is in my heart.”

Something inside you tightens at her words.

To feel the truth of something rather than see it—it’s a concept that should scare you. But as you sit there, watching her, listening to the quiet conviction in her voice, you can’t help but want that.

To believe without hesitation. To know something so deeply that no confirmation is ever needed.

You swallow, steadying yourself before you ask the question that you’ve wanted to hear the answer from her for a while now but have been too hesitant to ask.

“Do you love me?”

The words leave your lips softly, but they carry a weight that settles in the space between you.

Natasha tilts her head slightly as if searching your expression for the reason behind your sudden question.

And then, after a beat, she stands from her seat.

You watch as she makes her way around the table, stopping when she’s close enough to lean against the edge beside you.

Her hand lifts, fingers brushing gently against your cheek before her palm cups the side of your face. Her thumb strokes your skin—slow, deliberate.

And then, finally—

“I love you,” she says.

It’s firm, unshaken. No hesitation, no uncertainty. Just truth.

A breath of relief escapes her lips as the words settle into the air between you, as if she had been waiting—aching—to say them.

Your heart swells, warmth blooming in your chest.

And in that moment, you understand what she meant.

You don’t need your power to know she isn’t lying. You feel the truth in every word.

Without hesitation, your hand reaches up to the back of her neck, pulling her down into a deep, lingering kiss.

She doesn’t hesitate either. She returns it instantly, sinking into the moment as if she had been waiting for this, needing this as much as you have.

When you finally pull back, lips still brushing against hers, you murmur against her mouth, “I love you too, Natasha.”

A grin spreads across her lips, her breath warm against yours as she presses a featherlight kiss to your lips—soft, lingering, a quiet savoring of the moment.

“I know,” she murmurs, her voice filled with warmth.

You barely have a second to bask in the glow of her confession before you catch the subtle scrape of ceramic against the wooden table.

Your instincts kick in immediately.

Without breaking eye contact, your hands find hers just as she tries to slide your plate away. With a firm grip, you press her hands down against the table, standing as you give her a knowing, pointed look.

“That doesn’t mean you get to take away my food, Romanoff,” you say, playful yet unwavering.

Natasha raises a brow at your challenge. She doesn’t pull away from your grip—at least, not yet.

Her expression shifts, mischief flickering behind her green eyes as she tilts her head slightly, the barest hint of a smirk tugging at her lips.

“I’m trying to prevent the person I love from getting further injuries from my cooking,” she counters smoothly.

Then, without warning, she leans in, her lips grazing against yours—so soft, so fleeting that it barely qualifies as a kiss.

It’s a tease, deliberate, and infuriatingly effective.

You instinctively chase after the sensation, leaning forward, but she stays just out of reach, hovering close enough that you can feel the smirk curling against her lips.

Her breath fans across your skin as she murmurs, voice a hushed, teasing challenge.

“Do you really think you can stop me from doing that?”

The words send a slow shiver down your spine, and in an instant, the playful tension between you crackles like a live wire. Your fingers tighten around hers slightly, your grip firm yet unyielding. A silent declaration.

Your body presses closer, the air between you thickening as you arch a brow.

“I think I have a shot,” you counter, voice low, measured, daring.

Natasha hums, the sound laced with knowing amusement. Her eyes flick down to your lips, lingering for a fraction of a second before locking back onto yours, her own shimmering with something equal parts affection and mischief.

She tilts her head slightly, and the corner of her lips quirks up.

“You really are bad at lying,” she murmurs.

And then, before you can respond, she closes the distance.

Her lips press against yours—not teasing this time, not fleeting. The kiss is slow but firm, filled with an unmistakable sense of certainty.

You lean into it without hesitation, swallowing any words she might have added, neither confirming nor denying her remark.

Not that it matters.

You already know the truth without needing to see the red glow around yourself.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

a/n: thank you for reading! I know a lot of you were looking forward to this, so I hope you all were able to enjoy this part also.

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff fanfic #natasha romanoff x you #black widow x reader #natasha x reader #natasha romanov x reader #natasha romanoff

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dont-look-its-embarrassing · 23 hours ago

Text

Inner Ace pt.2

The Hunting Incident

I'm glad you guys like this idea! Personally, I couldn't really jive well with the image of Feyre just balls to the wall learning how to hunt suddenly and being perfect at it to survive. This storyline was my original bridge for that in my mind, so I am glad that it went well with you all :)

Update right before I post; I'm going to be honest I got EXTREMELY carried away with this one, so I apologize for the length...

Summary: As the time went by and tensions rose between the human lands and fae, the IC have been working tirelessly to try and maintain a balance and a new ally. As The High Lord and Lady cannot be outside their court for long (as other matters must be attended to in preparation for the war), Azriel is designated liaison for reporting back on the movements and whereabouts of the human queens. Having become friends through Feyre, Azriel finds himself spending more time with the human girl, coming to his own conclusion of close friendship and more? Late nights between the two have confusing tensions rise, that is until the Inner court makes a group stop to check in with Y/n before talking with the queens. An accident has not only the IC realizing this bond might go deeper then friends, but a realization within the Spymaster himself as he finds himself gazing at the beautiful woman more often than not.

Warnings: injury, cannon typical violence, fluff, sexual tension, (a little) angst, potential non-cannon faebane workings (ngl some of it is lost on me), non-cannon time (meaning it is a bit longer of a timeline bc wym this all happened in less than a couple years?!), injury, alcohol consumption

Pt 1 Masterlist

WC (I forgot this in the first part, oops): 11,301

The time that Feyre and the males came and went from her home left Y/n's head spinning. Although for a couple days, the relief and warmth within her home was notably missing upon their departure back to their court. Although Y/n understood that Feyre had in fact become an influential power figure within their world, the hole that she leaves when her presence is gone always has Y/n reeling. She wouldn't describe herself as some who is dependent on another person or her friends, but it sure does make the cold nights a bit warmer with the promise of seeing them tomorrow. Y/n had grown extremely close to the bunch within her home. As her status of 'best friend' with Feyre was any sort of key, the rest of the males quickly followed suit with dinners and time spent with each other talking and getting to know about the other party. Although Cassian had to be cut off with some of the stupid invasive questions he asked the girl, it only fueled the bond that they all began to share. It made the goodbye (although not for forever) harder for them all.

"You need to come back and see me." Y/n had eyed the Feyre down, not allowing her to break. "This isn't a request or some sort of bargain that I don't understand. You are going to make time for a sit-down gossip session like we used to have."

Laughing as if this plan would happen within a week, at most, Feyre had embraced Y/n in an all-encompassing hug.

"Of course."

Giving a nod and pulling away, Y/n's eyes had met that of the High Lord, Rhys. Upon a small chat with Feyre, Y/n had been informed that this man, or male, was Feyre's forever bond or something. He had offered a warm smile, one that Y/n sent back easily.

Again, something that the human girl didn't fully understand, but respected none the less.

"Thank you for letting us stay. I know that it was a risk, we won't forget that and are in your debt." The small eye roll that Y/n couldn't hold made him chuckle.

"Relax there, lover boy." A nickname that again, upon hearing about her best friend's lover, was given. It had caused an exaggerated aghast look when Y/n had used it only days ago, which also made her tense in worry that she had insulted him, but the loud laughs that Feyre couldn't hold in let her tension ease.

The chuckle to her right brought her attention to the gentle giant that she now knows as Cass. He was a breeze to get along with to say the least. Although her initial assessment as him being the biggest- thus- scariest was the most far off out of the three. Granted, he was a force to be reckoned with, but amongst friends he was nothing but a pile of jokes, laughs and warmth.

His large stature altered a bit sideways as he folded his large wings into himself further as to not hit his brother, turning towards Y/n.

"I'm offended I didn't get an invite to this gossip session." The human girl laughed while giving a hug into the side of the larger male.

"You can't gossip when the topic of the gossip is there." She joked. Shaking his head, Cassian offered another squeeze to her body before letting go and stepping back a bit.

Then all who was left was Azriel.

The very male that she admittedly harbored a small stupid crush on as his soft shadows continued to swirl around her space. They had had multiple conversations, but also multiple silences, just allowing each other to exist in the other's company. Over these past few days, it was found that they had very similar sleeping habits, finding it hard to find peace to rest and keeping them up to all hours of the night. Initially, the small creek of the Spymaster sneaking out of his room the first night had Y/n shooting up off the couch, throwing the book she had been reading to the ground. Azriel had apologized that night for startling her, but it was also the night they became comfortable within the space together.

"Can't sleep?" Her voice was soft, soft enough to have the spymaster's eyes flutter slightly at the sound. Her silhouette was illuminated by the hearth that still flickered in life, it made the curve of her form warm and inviting to his eye. The setting was oddly, intimate.

"No, sadly." He offered. Y/n nodded while taking ahold of her hands, laying them in front of herself. Azriel realized it wasn't a defensive or uncomfortable gesture, just one that was simply inquiring. Not knowing what else to offer, Azriel attempted to meet her halfway realizing he had stepped into her impromptu 'room' as she had given away her only beds to himself and his court. "Cassian snores."

Azriel winced the moment the sentence came out of his mouth. Never in his life has he felt so inept to talk to a female.

However, nothing could prepare him for the soft bell like sound of a hushed giggle that resonated from Y/n. Her eyes held mirth as she picked up the book from the floor and moved her bedding over on the larger seat, placing herself in one of the corners.

"Well, you are more than welcome to come here for some peace. I normally read until much later." Offering the seat on the other corner of the more comfortable couch Azriel couldn't push down the budding warmth that spread within his chest.

Y/n couldn’t help it. She didn’t know why her nerves settled with this fae in particular, but the dry remark of Cassian snoring had her defensive pacifism towards him dropping like the dead. He looked just as lost and hesitant as she was, she couldn’t help but giggle at it. The image of this tall, dark and handsome powerful being having the same reserves about someone as frail as herself made this whole ‘I should be worried’ thing seem petulant. If he truly meant her harm, she knew she would’ve already been dead.

He stood there for a moment, Y/n assumed he was trying to figure out what to do about the offer.

“There are some novels on the shelf under the stairs.” She offered. “You’re more than welcome to help yourself if you need something to pass the time.”

"Thank you." His tone was soft enough to match Y/n's as he took a step or two over to the desired pages. Assessing the shelf's titles, he grabbed one, grey in color. Brining himself back to the offered seat, Y/n made sure to do one more check to see if he had space to sit and adjust. Upon his weight settling on the cushion less than a foot away from her, she relaxed back into her position.

A soft silence settled over the two as the popping of the fire's light licked at their skin.

Azriel didn't know how much time had passed, he was a good chunk of his novel through, when he glanced back to the human girl. Y/n had been fully engrossed in the story that played before her. Luckily, the binding of the book didn't give way to the soft love story that unfolded within the pages. The glimmer in her eye caught by the Spymaster as a question flooded his mind. Without much thought, he let his inquiry slip through his lips, falling victim to the comforting nature of his company.

"How do you know how to read?" The deep baritone broke Y/n out of her trance. However, the question made an easy sly smile spread on her face. Slowly turning her head to meet Azriel's gaze, Y/n couldn't tell if it was the warmth of the fire that painted his cheeks in a dusty rose, of it he truly didn't think before he spoke.

Azriel wanted the floor to swallow him.

What was he thinking?

How do you know how to read? Really.

The laughs of his shadows taunted him as he swallowed, beginning to try and dig himself out of his never-ending hole.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that-" Scanning her face, that sly smile and raised brows queued him into her train of thought just enough to cut himself off. "You think it's funny." He whispered a deadpan.

"I think this is hilarious, to be quite frank." Y/n closed her book, placing it at her side while returning her attention back to the male. "Out of the two of us, I should be the one stumbling over my words and saying the wrong things."

A sigh followed through her lips; Az fought himself to lean closer.

"But here you are, all of you." Y/n gestured to the bulk of the male on the couch, "Do I make you nervous?"

Azriel allowed his shoulders to fall, melt into the space and even felt his guard lower enough for the girl to peek through.

"I haven't figured that out yet." He offered, placing his book down as well, allowing himself to turn towards the girl. A brief pause as they looked at each other.

"You were asking that because Feyre couldn't, right?" Y/n began. Az nodded a simple 'yes', allowing her to bring her knees to her chest, getting comfortable. "I barely knew myself when I found her, and we became close. I had maybe two, no, three books?" Y/n's eyes had glazed in memory.

"It was always on the list of things to try and teach her, but I could only work so fast." The spymaster quirked his head towards her at that, an elaborative gesture. "Survival seemed more important." Was all Y/n gave him. She had hoped it wasn't received as a 'I don't want to talk about it', but it was simply a sore spot for her. She had faulted herself on all the things she never got to do with her best friend, but truly, some things were more important.

"From when she left, I got better. Taught myself to read more sophisticated books to a degree and attempting to write when I could." Y/n looked down, blush coating her cheeks. "I still can't write very well. It isn't super legible."

Azriel had imagined this was similar to how his brother felt upon realizing the female in front of him was pushed aside on something so vital but simple.

"Would you like to practice? I can help."

"You are only going to be here for a couple days."

"I'll be back." Y/n was surprised at the instancy and promise that laced Azriel's voice. For her, she would be lucky to see Feyre again after this, but now, there is another promise for someone else to come see her. For someone else to care about seeing her.

"Okay." The heat didn't leave her cheeks for the rest of the night as their conversation continued after that, soft and vulnerable in nature. As the rest of the house slept, it would be a little secret of theirs and routine for the following days. Every night, right as Cassian would start to snore within the shared bedroom, Y/n could count on the shadow of wings and a soft hum of blue stones making his way down to the couch, grabbing a book on his way.

"I'll be back." Azriel said, bringing back Y/n the present. His tone wasn't as warm as that night, but the underlying promise still stood prominent between them. A small elbow jab into the side of Rhys had him turning to his mate, clocking the excitement in her eyes as she watched the two.

You are sending him back here upon the earliest opportunity.

Of course, Feyre darling.

Y/n hadn't moved from her spot and Azriel didn't know if he should go for an embrace like his brother or keep his distance. Everything in his being told him closer, closer, closer.

Closer. Closer. Closer. Embrace. She wants it. Embrace.

Or it was just his shadows pushing him towards her. Y/n had noticed during the time they spent together; his shadows couldn't help but flock to the similar nape of her neck like they had done the night they met. Upon its repeated offense, Y/n had assured the spymaster that it was a welcomed experience and to not worry about it. To her, she couldn't quite grasp the whole 'they are a part of me' conversation, so in her mind, every so often the slipped out from his control.

Azriel didn't correct this way of thinking at all. In fact, he indulged in it more than he probably should have. When she had left for the woods, a small cluster of them had followed her without much of her knowledge. Anytime her frame was out of his gaze a small tendril would follow, reporting back to its' owner of any inconvenience or issue that she might come across. It was a precautionary measure for his high lady's best friend, at least that is what he told himself as his mind eased with the quick sight of shadow darting behind her neck.

The brush of wind and breath against Y/n's ear had her shiver slightly. Even without a welcome embrace of the male, this was oddly more him.

As the group funneled out of the door, the promise of aid and help floated in her direction before they had disappeared into what seemed was the wind.

She wouldn't see anyone from that group again until a week or so later when a rapt on her door drew her attention from the meal she was prepping for that night. She hadn't been expecting anyone, her normal buyer for game wasn't set to arrive until next week and her produce hadn't grown in for the month yet to be selling, so Y/n was at a loss.

Hesitantly making her way to the door, she stopped to listen to see if anyone would inquire about who they were or what they wanted. Upon pressing her hands against the door in preparation to crack it open, a familiar breath against her ear made an involuntary smile take ahold of her features.

"You know, it is pretty cold out here. Could you please open the door?" The voice of Azriel came out muffled through the wood.

Y/n couldn't open the door quick enough to grab the male and drag him inside.

A small chuckle rung from him as he followed her in quickly.

"You can't do that!" She chastised, quickly closing the curtains and peeping out the window to make sure nobody was around.

"I didn't want to be rude."

"Ya? Well, be rude. You will get yourself killed otherwise."

"Am I supposed to just winnow in here then?"

"Win what?" Azriel stopped, placing a small sack down on the couch, turning to her with amusement in his eyes. His brow raised in question, asking to continue, it had Y/n nodding.

"Remember when we left?" Y/n nodded again; the motion making the spymaster's chest flutter. "It seemed that we just..." He searched for the word, "disappeared?"

"Yes, I assumed one of you had magic wind powers that no one told me about." Y/n knew she sounded stupid, ignorant even, but this whole experience made her ignorant to what felt like everything. However, Y/n would be as ignorant as she needed to be to elicit the loud laugh that came from Azriel. He was sat down now, all but sprawled on the couch in laze. The two had been comfortable before, now with his return it seemed they had entered a much deeper trust.

"No, that's not-" another laugh, "not how it works." Y/n followed suit, letting herself settle on the nearby seat. She giggled at the situation.

"What? You can't expect me to get that right first guess." Her giggles filled in the space between Azriel's now dwindling laugh.

"It is actually close now that I think about it." Looking to her again he began his short explanation. "It is some sort of magic. Cassian can't do it."

"Ah, I see. Doesn't have the ol' flare that the rest of you have?" The spymaster didn't want to think to clearly about the ease in which this girl pulled a relaxed smile from him.

"No, I guess not." He had continued with his little explanation, Y/n nodding the whole way through. Upon his finale she had adjusted herself to stand again. His eye's grazed over her form as she stood.

"Where are you going?" Her cheeks warmed.

"Just to add some more ingredients for dinner."

"Oh, speaking of which..." Az had reached for the bad he had tossed onto the furniture earlier, prying open the top. Reaching in he had grabbed a handful of a smaller pouch that resided in it. Upon tossing it towards Y/n, her hand instinctually catching it from the air. It was heavy and 'clinked' when it landed within her palm, that familiar weight and sound had the girl's eyes widening. "That is from the court."

"By the gods, this is a little much for a couple months, no?" It wasn't that Y/n was ungrateful, but a pouch filled as much as this one could have her living more than comfortably for a long time around here.

"It isn't that much Y/n."

"Yes, it is."

"Not for Rhys."

"Still, I feel bad."

"Why do you feel bad?"

"Because I feel like I'm using you guys."

"You are not using us."

"Really? Because how heavy this is I would say I'm using."

"Just take the coins Y/n."

"Okay."

Y/n twirled back towards the kitchen, quickly finding her stash of money and hiding it away. The quick banter between the two lingering in the air as a grin still remained on both of their faces. Following through with her plan, Y/n began adding some more portions to the already marinating meats.

The hours passed by quickly, an ease of comfort and warmth enveloping the two while Azriel got his tasks in order for what he needs to find and where he could go to find it. Y/n didn't pry much about his work, obviously seeing the tenseness gradually seeping into his form with each shadow that would return to him. So, as dinner came and went, the girl had made herself busy preparing his room and planning her route for the next day.

When she came back to the living room moments later, Y/n was surprised to see the lack of the hulking male that was once sat on her couch. Picking up her pace, she had quickly cracked the front door to see if he had left by foot. Upon finding no footprints on the snow, she shut the door and returned to cleaning up the place a bit more before his return.

Hours ticked by, Y/n had changed and prepped for bed quietly stepping back into her living room, grabbing the latest novel on her way. She had adorned a simple nightgown, nothing fancy or elaborate like what she had seen the Archerons wear after Feyre's departure, but the garment was divine to sleep in, emphasizing the "gorgeous silhouette" that her best friend had insisted about. She had worn it many times before, but the idea of the Spymaster seeing her in it had her heart skip a beat at the thought.

Y/n had taken her seat across from the fire that cackled, opened her novel, and began to read.

Azriel was annoyed.

He had gotten a whisper from one of his shadows about movement within one of the queen's guards and upon his departure, he didn't even have time to leave a note. Az knew that she wouldn't fret after hearing the summary of winnowing hours prior, but the thought of her looking for him without explanation about his absence struck a chord within his chest. He had been staked out for hours, not moving or even twitching from his position amongst the dark. The whispers continued to circle him, all reporting the same thing.

He had wasted his time tonight, there was nothing substantial going on with the Human Queen.

He let the vein in his forehead throb with the clench of his jaw. He had turned once more, checking the area around himself before settling on the decision to leave. His body almost longed for warmth despite his anatomy making it very hard for him to be actually cold. Azriel stopped his thought before he could dive any deeper on the thought of the specific heat he craved.

Home. Back. Beauty. Soft. Beauty. Leave.

It was a drug he couldn't quit. Without much else of a thought, Azriel had allowed his shadows to take him back to your little house that stood at the edge of the wall. Taking your prior conversation (and as much of a threat as Y/n could conjure towards him), he had winnowed right into the living room, bypassing the door.

Warm. Soft. Beauty. Look. Look. Look.

Azriel's eyes had trailed over to the couch, Y/n's form capturing his attention immediately. His shadows hadn't been lying, the way you laid was that of a spiritual sight. The curve of your body held gently by a soft looking nightdress that she must've put on after he left. The familiar lick of the hearth's light caressing her softly, almost akin to the most attuned lover, kissing her skin and shadows.

I was a sight that Azriel forced himself to memorize, and one that he knew he would see in his dreams to come.

It was obvious that you had been reading, the novel fallen on to the floor with some pages crinkled with its own weight.

Although Azriel didn't want to disrupt the sight of something so vulnerable and captivating, the thought of her sore body the next day from a fitful rest on the used couch made him move quickly. He had prayed to whatever deity that listened that his 'quiet' reputation proceeded him as he took steps on the creaking floor to get to Y/n without waking her. Upon his success, he let out a silent breath.

As effortless as she looked, Azriel had picked her up cradling her to himself as securely as possible without altering her form. Her slight sigh and twitch had him stalling for a moment, checking her heartbeat to ensure she was in fact still asleep. With his confirmation, he began his trek up the stairs and towards her room. He had passed by it multiple times during his prior time with his court, but holding her now as he placed her onto the bed, it stirred that inexplainable flutter in him.

Az had wanted to start helping Y/n on her writing tonight, but the subtle (although meaningless) shift in guard had pulled him away.

Tomorrow night then.

Y/n was ecstatic to have the spymaster around for as long as he did. Although only a couple days, the two had bonded and laughed with each-other. Much to Yn’s surprise, Az had been adamant on beginning her practice with a pen. It was a bit rough in the beginning, but by the end of his stay she was confident in some of the letters and how they flowed.

But sadly as all things do, he had to return home.

It was another awkward goodbye, this time the brush of his shadows lingered, almost matching the lingering gaze he shared with her. Y/n had sworn she almost got lost in it.

He had left her with the same promise as before.

“I’ll be back.” Then the male all but vanished from her door.

The next time he had stopped by it was in a flurry of motion, one that even had Y/n reeling. He had apologized before vanishing away only to be back in the middle of the night. Upon the sun rising, he had left a platter of produce on the table with another small pouch of coins and a note explaining his hasty departure.

It made Y/n smile, although disappointed she couldn’t see him more.

Occurrences like that became common for the two. His stays never lasting more then a couple of days at most before he was gone again. Through Azriel’s increased trips, Feyre had akin him to a letter boy with all of her messages and small trinkets that she wished to tell her still human best friend. As for Y/n? She couldn’t be happier in her life if she tried. Sure, Feyre wasn’t here with her next door and the male she has come to crush on like had their own demons to fight which took their time, but for the first time in a very long time Y/n felt remembered.

Even though the last trip that Azriel had taken tested the waters between the two, and Y/n would be damned if she didn’t stay up at night in embarrassment.

The breath against her ear didn’t startle Y/n anymore. She had become akin to the soft silken caress of the spymasters shadows and even reveled in their touch when they caressed her neck. The snow had officially begun to melt by now, the ground slowly becoming soft as the sky broke away to the sun once more.

“I need to wash the bedding in your room before you retire for the night.” She had twirled around, gentle and soft, adding to the allure of the scent of fruit that she had been cutting prior. There stood Azriel, as beautiful as ever, in her foyer looking over her form. It was a welcome gesture as since as much as she had tried capture his attention, he seemed as fortified as a fortress. Y/n would be lying if she said she didn’t attempt to try and test the boundaries between them. A glance here, accidental brush there, the best of her wardrobe when preparing dinner for herself hoping he would snatch her away.

The last thought was a bit much, but her mind didn’t care.

Az had noted a couple visits prior, sent a compliment towards her and the dress she had managed to adorn through the leftovers of the last coin pouch. It was a frivolous purchase, but she knew she needed to be a bit more open to receiving help as Feyre would have her had (and no doubt Azriel’s) if she didn’t.

“Don’t fret if it isn’t done until later.” The Spymaster assured. Y/n couldn’t help but throw a questioning glance at him. “I have to check something out for a bit and report. Might be a little while.”

“Shall I count you for dinner?” Y/n had hopes he would as she had missed him from his time away. “I’m going to grab some drinks from the market today, I was hoping you would try them with me.”

“I should hope so. If not this will be a long night.” Y/n smiled at that.

“Any specific types of drink you prefer?”

“Whatever you favor.” Azriel did not know much of human alcohol, he assumed there was the standard of wine, but that was as far as he had ventured. It wasn’t worth much to fae as it was not nearly as potent to have any sort of effects.

“Ah, I well then it’ll be a surprise to us both.” Y/n had turned around fully, back to her task, and also to hid the slight brushing of red that dusted her cheeks. She was embarrassed by her lack of experience, but he didn’t need to know that.

Obviously, Azriel figured it out, and quickly at that. Her hesitance with accepting his answer along with the slight rush of her heart and as a dead giveaway. Thinking about it now he assumed that there wasn’t much that this human girl could lie to him about that he wouldn’t catch. Az knew he can read people well, but this was almost effortless, as if he was attuned to those emotions.

He also knew that since her experience was limited, if at all, she would definitely have 0 tolerance.

Even if Az would be caught up in the most perilous situation (he wouldn’t be, but even so) he would make sure to find himself back at this little house by sundown.

As for Y/n, the idea that the male would be there for the experience brought a sense of comfort to her. Yes, it wasn't Feyre like she had hoped as since they had planned to get her 'inebriated' according to her best friend, but it was someone.

Y/n wouldn't be alone.

Plus, the person she would spend the experience with was a hulking dark and handsome male, so that was a huge bonus.

It wasn't long before Azriel had head out, making sure to bid a small farewell and promise to see her tonight. Y/n had taken this opportunity to not only tidy up the house, make sure his room was cleaned and ready, but also to make herself a bit more presentable to head into town. It wasn't often that she ventured this way, most times she was fresh from the forest and outside her house skinning the latest kill for fur and cuts of meat. Occasionally she would venture in with produce and some wheat she could grow year-round, both instances made for dirty work and one that wasn't very presentable.

Now as she ventures that way, freshly bathed, adorning new clothes and smelling like berries; Y/n felt new.

She had missed the glances her way from the men around her, and the warmth she was received with from the elderly women as she walked by. The way she had held herself was that of a below common person, but in the eyes of the people, she was anything but. If they hadn't watched the girl grow up there would be no doubt that she would be mistaken for the very thing they feared most from her beauty alone.

"Hello." Y/n found herself standing outside a small storefront, the walls adorned with bottles. Within the booth, a smaller man sat, a worn cap on his head. He received her with a smile.

"What can I help you with ma'am?" Y/n roamed her eyes over the shelf hesitantly. The different bottle heights, sizes and colors making her indecisive. The shop keep must've seen the nervousness in her eyes as he let out a small chuckle.

"I can give you some recommendations, if you would like?"

The breath of relief was audible from the girl.

"Yes please."

"What is the occasion?" The question wasn't targeted or sly of any sort, more so inquiring for a better understanding of what he should recommend to Y/n, but she couldn't help but nervously ring her neck where a small wisp hid as blush spread over her skin. She had a small hope that (despite not knowing how they work) her hand clasping over the small silken thing would stop it from potentially hearing the conversation.

"I have a friend coming for dinner tonight."

"Do you want something to pair with the meal or for after?" A small amount of mirth entered the man's eyes as he mentioned beyond the food. It made the color darken on Y/n's neck and spread to her ears.

"I'm not sure..." She hesitated; it was so out of her element for her to even think such a thing could happen for her. Yeah, aside a couple nights with Feyre where they wanted to "practice" and learn with someone they were comfortable with (at least some of it), Y/n hadn't been with anyone. The thought of her being entrapped in passion, much like the books she enjoys every so often, with another had her already nervous stomach filling with flutters. It only increased when the thought of the fae male being the one to spend it with. "Both?"

She didn't mean to say it as a question, really. The man's grin widened as he nodded, turning around to his inventory. He reached under the counter, shuffling some things out of the way before grabbing what he desired. Before a second passed, he had placed a short red bottle on the counter. Y/n eyed it carefully as the lowering sun's rays hit it perfectly to see the rose-colored liquid inside.

"Pair this with any sort of fruit or shoot it straight. It can be sipped on or mixed." Y/n nodded, checking the price as he turned around again. She could easily get the bottle and another with the ruminants of the coin purse that Az had brought his last visit. Upon fixing his room up earlier, she had seen another stashed away in his bag with her initial on it. She wanted to give the small delicate fabric bag back to the spymaster as she had felt bad for having it as long as she did, so a little drink would be the perfect occasion to use it on.

"Red or white meat tonight for dinner?"

As Y/n ventured back towards the house, the sun began to officially set beyond the tree line. She had picked up a bit of pace on her way back to make sure she had enough time to put on the slip dress she adored so much. Upon her arrival home, Y/n glanced at the windows (which remained curtain shut as to keep out the eyes of others) in hopes to potentially see the outline of a male. She had left fireplace lit and the candle lanterns around the house going as to make sure he had light if he did come back early. Entering the house however, Y/n didn't feel the presence of the shadows or their master within. Placing the alcohol on the table, Y/n made her way upstairs to change and freshen up her appearance.

Upon her satisfaction she made her way back downstairs and to the table where the drinks lie.

She had taken them out of the bag, placing the wine she had purchased for the meal on the small table. Keeping the smaller red bottle with her as she went to the cabinet, Y/n grabbed two cups.

She didn't have any fancy glassware so this would have to do. She highly doubted Azriel would mind.

Placing the cup she meant for him on the table next to the wine, Y/n couldn't help the wandering eye towards the little red bottle that stood ominously on the counter. The way the fire licked at the color looked taunting, but the continued flutter in her stomach at the thought of the spymaster had an idea popping in her head.

Maybe she should try it. Just a little.

Y/n had to make sure it was good before she served it, right?

Before she let herself think too much on the decision, the human girl had popped the lid off, poured a couple seconds into the glass, and shot it back.

The taste was not something she had expected in the slightest. It was sweet, to a degree, with a smoothness that allowed it to gently slide down her throat. The heat that came with the liquid surprised her. Her chest that had been tight all day with the image of her guest warmed and relaxed, the feeling still lingering, but did not have as much of a hold on her.

Y/n like this liquid, she had hopes Azriel would too. Maybe he would even compliment her for picking it out.

A small shy smile broke onto her features at the thought.

Azriel had watched as the sun receded below the tree line. He had done everything he needed to do with his report and check in, quickly making time to tie up any loose ends while he was there. Nothing violent (luckily, as he didn't want to scare a specific human upon his arrival home) but simple covering of his tracks and finalizing some plans before next month.

Everything was clicking into place perfectly as far as he knew.

Giving a small nod to himself, he felt his shadows pull him back to the small house, eager to see the girl within. He didn't fight them but simply allowed himself to appear withing the familiar foyer. The smell of food was the first thing that he had noticed. For a human, with the limited palette that they possessed, Y/n had somehow crafted her cooking to be palatable by fae standards. It had been a plus of his visits here as he could enjoy his time and not feel like he was starving unlike the trip to the other Archeron's house all that while ago.

The second thing he noticed was the bottle of what looked to be some sort of human wine on the table. Az allowed a small warm smile to spread at the gesture. It was sweet, like her, to pick something out that he knew she had heard him talk about prior when recalling his time with his family. It gave insight to just how much she had been listening to him.

The third thing he noticed was the second, smaller bottle sitting on the table slightly behind the human wine. It had been obviously opened as with his quick assessment Az guessed it was about half empty. Taking a step or two to the table, Azriel had picked up the bottle to examine it.

Upon a small sip of the liquid Azriel found It was strong, almost illusionary with its taste. Even he, as fae, felt the warmth go down his throat and a small heat to fill his chest. Confusion gripped him.

This was definitely not a human made drink. If he had any guesses, he would have thought this was some sort of sipping fae gin infused with some sort of floral to cut the bite.

Half the bottle gone made him notice the fourth thing within the house, Y/n's form on one of the seats reading. If the obvious red on her cheeks was any give away to her status at the moment, her lack of notice when he had entered the house would be the most obvious telltale sign.

Y/n was drunk. Deceptively so as she sat cozied up in the chair, obviously reading some sort of romance book.

Az had placed the bottle down a little harder than he normally would, allowing the small ring to jolt Y/n out of her fantasy.

"Azriel! You're back!" Springing up off the couch with more grace than any sane person who is drunk, Y/n had effortlessly gotten to Azriel and enveloped him into a small embrace. It made the male freeze, unsure if he should wrap his arms around the girl or wait until she removed herself from him.

How desperately he wanted to return the embrace.

So, fueled by the liquor that ran through her veins, he settled his hands just above her waist.

Y/n couldn't believe that he made it back for dinner. She didn't try to stop that joy from spreading to her face as the warmth in her body buzzed through her. She didn't mean to drink as much of the liquid as she did, but once she started, the confidence and buzz that came quickly after felt reliving from her crushing nerves.

"I have dinner ready! I also got some of the wine the man at the stall recommended!" Y/n all but burst at the seams with the male's small smile towards her.

"Did he also suggest the other bottle too?" The question was soft, careful to not seem as if she had done something unknowingly wrong. He wasn't upset or anything with her, just an ounce of concern resided in him for her head tomorrow morning.

"He did! It's wonderful too. Try it!" With or without her knowledge, there was very little Azriel wouldn't do for the look that Y/n gave him. Her eyes wide and shining towards him. Very few times had he every received something like this from someone. Az had watched his brothers receive these looks and vulnerability, but never did he think someone could feel safe enough with him to be worthy of it.

Here Y/n stood, almost toe to toe with the fae, giving the best attempt at 'the eyes' that Feyre had talked to her about when they were younger. It was stupid, she knew this, but it was the best time to try and test her effect with them. She made sure to bat her eyes a couple times to emphasize her request towards the shadow singer until he gave a little chuckle and broke away from the embrace. His scarred hands reached for the red bottle and not to long after he was taking a long draw of it from the cup Y/n had selected for him.

"And? Did I do well?" Y/n fished. Azriel gave in quickly.

"Yes, very well. It is quite good, just like how the food smells." Y/n jumped. "Is it ready?"

"Yes!" Y/n all but bounced over to the kitchen, grabbing a plate and handing it to Azriel who had followed behind her. They had sat to eat, allowing the small talk between them to carry. All the while, Y/n had opened the wine and began to pour for herself and Az. It was different then the red bottle liquid. More drinkable and less potent for her. The stall owner did in fact call the type to pair well as one glass became two, two became three, and soon the bottle was done.

Y/n was surely floating.

Azriel should have stopped her after the first glass. The slowing of her movements, softness within her eye, the normal sharp wit reduced to putty as she gently talked. All of it was also why he didn't. It had been so long since someone talked to him gently, reached for him softly, asked him about little details that would normally never matter about himself.

It was as addicting as the drink she had finished minutes before.

Her standing sent a small shock of surprise through him. Her reaching for his finished plate while holding her own had him slightly panicked. He had made notion to stand and take his own plate to put away, but the soft 'I got it' and gentle ease of her hand putting pressure on his shoulder to sit again kept him stationary. Everything in himself put the idea of her serving him in such a way put his nerves on fire. Maybe it was the gin, maybe it was the fact that he couldn't stop the way his eyes trailed the flow of that damned sleeping gown that had his hands twitching to grab.

"We can go to the couch if you want." She had returned to him and grabbed his hand, something that had Az analyzing her face to determine just how drunk she was. They had some physical contact before, but this was a new level.

Azriel luckily let her drag him over to the sitting room. She had guided him to the softest area to sit while she took position next to the male. Upon her placing herself next to him, all but draped on the furniture she let the drink drive her words.

"Is it cold?" Y/n forgot that the male couldn't read her mind, thus when the questioning look towards her and then the fire made a string of giggle slip from her lips. "When you fly silly."

Right, Az was the silly one right now. However, the inquiry was welcome as he settled into his seat and altered himself to see her more clearly.

"Not really. Only If I go really high, but it's dependent on the weather I guess."

"Really? I always thought it would be cold not matter what."

"I'm also just naturally hot."

"Yes, you are."

Azriel laughed.

"No, I mean physically."

"Ya, I know."

"No." Y/n couldn't help but let the confusion cross her face. She agreed with him, why was he laughing? Sure, she would listen to it any time he would give it to her, but it was lost on her why. "I mean I'm Illyrian, we are warm naturally."

The blush on her face all but multiplied and deepened in color, no longer just the drink affecting it.

"But I am glad you think I'm hot." Y/n tried her best to hide in her hands and hair, only for the male to gently reach for her jaw, tilting her head back for him to see. Y/n didn't stop his touch, nor did she stop her intrusive thought to test the theory of his warmth herself. She had strung her hand around his wrist, guiding his hand against her cheek. She didn't think it felt any different than her own hands., maybe it was because the fire behind Az's eyes distracted her.

She had shut her eyes, pressing his marred flesh into her soft skin.

Azriel was going to combust. He didn't know if it was from the ever growing affections for the girl (that he no longer fought as hard), or the growing issue she was causing if he let his thoughts slip for even a second (that he was fighting for his life against right now).

Y/n opened her eyes again, meeting Azriel's easily as a slow, easy smile spread over her. It was as simple as taking a breath. The comfort of it all was that of her relationship with Feyre, but this felt heavier. It was a welcome relief from all the cold and disdain she caught from her best friend's sisters.

"I'm really happy your here." Y/n dropped her hand, which still encased his. "I'm really happy you come to see me."

Y/n had to blink a couple times to make sure she wasn't imagining the slight color on the tips of his ears that she swore was not there prior. There was no look of surprise, or any sort of telltale sign of his that suggested that he was uncomfortable or upset at what she had said, but the wide-eyed look of his had her moving without her knowledge.

She felt her lips make contact with the shell of his ear before she had pulled away to see them doubled in color. Another giggle of hers bubbled out and into the room. Azriel was a statue under her touch, the only notable difference was his slightly heavier breathing that she caught sight of. Before mentioning it however, her head lulled to where his neck met his shoulder, trying to understand why the room seemed distorted more than it had before.

"I'm tired." It was the only conclusion in which she could come to about her predicament. She had felt the male above her nod and a rush of air. It seemed that the statue shadow singer had been holding his breath. Gently pushing her body off of himself much to her disappointment. He stood before her; however, Y/n gave no inclination to move. Her arms however raised in motion for him to succumb to her wishes as she didn't trust her legs to work. A small huff and chuckle exited him before allowing her to get away with such a behavior.

"Okay there little vixen, let's get you up." Her smile was contagious at the name, but she kept the rather heated comments to herself. As she settled into his arms, her own wrapped around his neck in a feeble attempt to try and make herself a bit lighter for the male, easier to carry. By no means was she a tiny woman, Feyre had gotten all the slim genes between them, and while she wasn't unable to live her life, Y/n had curves. Most of it was muscle from the years out hunting and foraging on her own, but it didn't stop the slight worry that she was in fact a bit heavy to Az as he carried her.

Each step that Azriel took was slow, calculated even. He had to try and control himself as to not scare the human girl staring at him so intently that it warmed him to his core.

He also prayed that if he moved slow enough, she wouldn't notice the problem that currently threatened to make itself know if she moves just a little. It sure didn't help that the flesh of her ass was held so easily against his arm, keeping her stationary against him.

Gods she was addicting, and so, so easy to become enamored with.

Azriel didn't understand how in just a couple of months that a human could be so dear to himself. He didn't doubt that the girl in his arms knew him in more depth than most within his life to this day. He truly believed she saw him.

He loved his family, but this was different.

Her bedroom came into view too quickly for Y/n's liking as she hadn't finished memorizing the feel of his chiseled body against hers. Swiftly, as the bed had come to view under her, Y/n had let go of the male and simply fell back into the comfy blankets and pillows below. Her mind swirled with her descent while the only thing that seemed to be in focus was the male of her affections.

"You can lay down too." Her own voice was foreign to her, no longer did she have control over the words that spilled out.

Azriel stood still, watching.

"I don't bite~"

Y/n had reached out to grasp his hand. Successful in her contact, she gently pulled him onto the bed, positioning him on his back, careful of his wings. Without much else of a thought, Y/n had moved his arm just right, allowing herself to curl up within the space it made against his torso. The warmth radiating from him had Y/n passed out in mere minutes, while the poor shadow singer fought demons to keep his composure and not jump the girl.

The next morning Y/n hadn't remembered the entirety of the night, but she sure did remember the little love-bite she had quickly delivered to his ear. She had apologized profusely if she had made him uncomfortable and swore off the sinning liquid. Azriel had insisted that she would in fact want to drink again, and that he didn't mind in the slightest about her welcome intrusion of his space. Y/n wasn't convinced but still took her apologies and made them breakfast while nursing her head.

Sadly, Azriel had to depart that day for a report he had to make to Rhys. This time however, he allowed himself to embrace Y/n, lingering slightly within her scent.

The most recent time in which Y/n had guests within her home, it was the entire Inner Court (or at least the ones she had met before).

"Y/n!" Feyre had yelled upon exiting the winnow into her house. Loud thuds had been heard from the second story before the familiar sight of the human girl raced past all the males and into the arms of her best friend.

"You're here!" If the embrace was any tighter, oxygen would be difficult to pass between them. The sight had made the males in the room melt as the familiar warmth of Y/n surrounded them. Even Azriel couldn't help the small smile that adorned his features despite the jab to his ribs from his brother.

"I am so sorry for the drop in with no warning, but the timing for our play with the queens seems to be now." Feyre had explained, pulling back to look at her.

"That is more than okay Angel, you're always welcome to come anytime you feel."

From the small amount of explaining and information that Azriel had given to Y/n prior through his visits, the timing of it all had seemed to be the most up in the air. They had enough on their plates and didn’t need another excuse to feel bad about being in her residence for the time being.

However, despite having the support of the court even now, she did not have enough to plan for when they were gone in a week or so for her stock. Thus, the decision was that she had to go out to the market, and also the forest. She needed to hunt again just so she can tide her stock over and keep her clients that she had built within the market. Plus, Y/n had wanted to make Feyre's favorite from when they were kids, which required a deer.

"Take up the rooms you had last time," Turning to Rhys and Feyre she gave a small smile, "I'll wash everything and change it for you guys when I'm back if that is okay."

"Don't worry about it Ace, is the washing still where it used to be?" the fae girl prompted. Y/n nodded with a smile. "Then I got it, we have to organize our plan here anyway. It'll give us a bit of a break before getting back to work."

"Knock yourselves out then."

After giving a quick hug to Cass, Y/n's eyes settled on Azriel who had taken a couple steps back. Her body gravitated slightly towards him while he brushed the back of his hand against her arm. It gave the human a surge of confidence.

"Welcome back." Y/n had allowed the low tone of her voice to carry a soft undertone which had the spymaster checking to make sure his family wasn't snooping since they had wandered towards their living arrangements.

"I missed you." The softness in his voice made Y/n melt.

"I missed you too."

Grabbing her hunting bow and dagger, she stepped towards the door. Y/n hesitated before opening the door and looked to the stair that led to her old and new friends. As the sun began to set, the obvious specks of light suggested she would not be alone out in those woods.

"I have to go and grab some things in the market and out..." Y/n trailed off. Azriel had glanced out the window briefly, not able to hide the small flicker of nervousness that showed there. Although Y/n didn't allow herself to let the moment proceed as she broke contact and turned toward the small table that resided near the door. She had taken out the small paper she had picked up some odd weeks ago and one of the pens Az had brought as a small gift. She had been practicing between visits and confidently scribbled the note down.

Out hunting for dinner. Be back soon, stay inside. The town is out.

Deciding that was enough, she strung her cloak over her small frame and headed out the door and towards the tree line, sparing a small glance at the shadow singer on her way out. Admittedly, she hated the forest during this time. There was a false spring that everyone had thought would bring the warm weather to only be hit by one more blow from the mother. With it brought a frigid cold and icy flurries that would no doubt melt by the end of the week. The snow and wind whipped all warmth she had away from her in a matter of minutes and the ever-concerning watchful eye of beasts who long to have her for supper also put her on edge.

Her body still noticed the absence of her friend that used to go not these little missions together. Although the girl is currently residing back at the house, it still stung for when she would leave. Y/n never really got used to the feeling of loneliness that came with her best friend's freedom. Although it was a selfish thought, she did miss the time they would spend hours together just chatting and getting through this life together. She missed her.

She was elated to have her back, even to this capacity. She would never stop being thankful for her return.

A cold tear shook her from her thoughts. Shaking her head, she wiped it away and moved on deeper and deeper into the forest.

Although she pulled the bow closer to her body, she achieved no extra security and for some reason she couldn’t shake the feeling of lurking danger beyond the trees that surrounded her. The wind whipped louder, blocking out the sounds of the forest and any audible cues that would give away a predator or prey. It added to the nerves of it all. It's why nobody should ever have to do this to survive.

As her boots crunched in the snow below her, she allowed her mind to wander as she squatted down into the white below. Here she would stay for an hour or so waiting for a migration or flock to cross her path. Since the snow and wind was so bad however, she highly doubted she could cross many prey, let alone a deer. Predators however were another story entirely, and she was sure she would come across one. Settling down once again, she relaxed the bow and rolled her shoulders, causing the assortment of ash arrows and regular to jumble further.

Hazel eyes flooded her thoughts as she waited. Specifically of a Fae man with wings that is currently resting within her residence that she had left at the door. One with blue stones and friendly darkness that always wrapped around the nape of her neck, it was almost as alluring as all the riches and security in the world. The night he moved her to the bedroom because he had felt unease about her resting on the couch while she had stupidly trusted a drink, the chance she opened her eyes and smiled at him, and he finally allowed a redness to spread over his face as she had kissed his ear. The late nights they would stay up and read, gentle conversation flowing from the both of them, it was intoxicating. Even more than the drink she is still haunted by.

Without the human girl's knowledge, Feyre had called it, and now Rhys owed her all new paints for her studio. The girl had probably the biggest affinity for the male in such a short time that either of them had seen. Granted it had been about two occurrences that the court had witnessed in person, but the closeness of the two and the flustered avoidance that the shadow singer would insist wasn't happening. It was all so obvious, and the first time that both of them where as readable as a book.

Hearing a snap in the twigs behind her, Y/n's body moved like water as she pulled her bow taught and aimed with a watchful eye to the intruder of her space. Loaded in the string was an ash arrow, until her eyes met with the very hazel she was just dreaming about.

“It’s just me.” Azriel said with his hands raised, eyeing the tip of the arrowhead. Y/n sighed and lowered the weapon giving a small smile to him. Even with the weather around the two, the male didn’t look even the slightest cold. Sensing the small displeasure of the stare at her arrow she stepped closer and rubbed the back of her neck.

“Ever since Feyre was almost killed and then taken by a Fae man, I’ve carried these. You never know out here, and I had a feeling if it were to happen again, I wouldn’t be so lucky.” She explained and he nodded slightly. The image of her suffering the same as his High Lady was nauseating but was worse as he knew she in fact wouldn’t be as lucky and most likely killed if she were to run into another enemy Fae. "I had it before meeting you all."

She had attempted to reason, hoping that he wouldn't take offense to her carrying the very thing that could kill him and his family.

Her nerves settled though when he nodded at her and offered a small smile to assure her there were no hard feelings.

“Why are you out anyway? I left a note; the town is out today, and I don’t want you all to get caught.” She poked before sending him a small smile as his shadows seemed to envelop her hands to try and keep them warm. The silken texture felt nice against her digits, as she brought them up to give a slight breath to hopefully add some warmth.

“I was worried.” It was simple and curt but the meaning behind it made flurries and warmth spread through Y/n's whole being. So much so, she felt as if she almost didn’t need the jacket.

“Oh,” She paused and looked into his eyes again as she hesitantly stepped closer, feeling a heat radiating from the larger male form. It had been a since the drinking incident that they were so close together. Thinking back to that night, Y/n allowed herself to giggle.

“You aren’t even feeling the cold are you.” It was more a statement than a question, and it made Azriel let out a smile and sigh.

“No. Perks of being an Illyrian I guess.” Y/n shook her head as she took another step into his warmth, allowing herself to fully engulf the memory of that night. He hadn’t stepped back or retreated from her body, so she took this as a chance to not only warm up slightly but also test the waters more openly, without alcohol. His eyes seemed to study her movements as his shadows still swarmed her hands, the curve of her body under the layers of cloth, the way her hair gently blew despite the howling wind, the way the snow reflected off her eyes. Even for a Fae she would be considered ethereal.

Snap

Before Azriel could even flinch and his mind could come back from the thoughts of the woman in front of him, Y/n had placed herself around his side with an arrow taught.

A yell erupted from whoever broke their peaceful encounter as Y/n let the arrow fly. She registered the Faebane soaked sword before the male behind her could and the throwing knife that he let in the direction of the shadow singer.

The arrow hit before Azriel processed what happened, and the man’s body hit the snow staining it with the familiar crimson. His eyes hardened at the sword that fell into the snow and the rage that permanently covered his face, he also noted the ash arrow that Y/n had buried in his chest with great pride. She was lethal, her abilities honed by pure survival and instinct. Even he was impressed by her response to danger. A pride that would soon turn to panic when the girl he became infatuated with turned towards him.

“I understand why the inside part was necessary-” He began but shortly cut himself off when his shadows screamed, and his eyes found that very crimson on Y/n. “Shit.” He began.

Y/n felt the dagger hit; she also knew that if she didn't put herself there it would've stuck the male behind her in the middle of his chest (although she highly doubted it landing as his shadows had coiled around himself without his realization she guessed). Luckily, she knew it didn’t hit anything too vital as it embedded into her shoulder, but it would leave one hell of a scar and at least a month of no hunting for her meals and trades.

“We need to go home.” She ground out. Azriel nodded quickly before scooping the smaller girl into his arms.

“You know, when I imagined of your size in my arms, I did not have this scenario in mind.” He attempted to joke, but when it landed and Y/n wheezed, it was painful. He cursed again and quickly melted into the shadows to get home.

“You think about that?” Y/n wheezed out. Allowing a small tense chuckle to escape him, he took in the now significantly paler girl.

"More times than I care to admit."

Coming to the familiar door, he rushed inside whilst the few of his family talked over some food and a fire. His sudden appearance had startled the group, and it took Rhys to speak up about the startled and shaken look on his shadow master’s face.

“Help her.” Such small words and yet the whole of the building into a frenzy. Launching up from the couch, Feyre cursed at the girl as she willed her magic into her smaller body to try and help heal her.

"What the hell happened?!" She exclaimed upon seeing the wound not close as she was intending. Unbeknownst to the group, Feyre had never seen her friend with this much blood on her. Sure, they had skinned and butchered game when they had got it, but it was never hers.

Feyre hated the sight.

Everyone did.

But none more than the male who had carried her back.

Cassian attempted to find any gauze and ointment that could take the edge off of her pain upon Feyre's directions to the cabinet, even if it was a slight improvement. The way the girl forced back her writhe of discomfort was not a welcome sight. Even Rhysand was with his mate tried to aid in the healing but to no avail, much to their shared displeasure. Azriel was on the other hand by Y/n’s face, watching to see any change and trying to comfort the small girl.

“I’m not dead, just dying if you don’t get this thing out of me and stop the bleeding.” She bargained trying to sit up wincing as she went, but the High Lady of the house pushed her back down.

“No, we are fixing this. Stay still. Please” Azriel grasped her hand trying to will his own agenda of her staying down and letting them heal her. He knew she would be fine. The wound wasn't fatal in the slightest and hadn't hit anything that would be a long-term issue.

The sight of this female, this human woman bleeding on a table with a throwing knife that was meant for him through his brain into a spiral. The nudge in his chest had begun to feel like the knife had hit him, not her.

“It won’t work.” She coughed. Everyone stopped to look at her as Cassian began unloading the things he found. “It was meant for Az, it’s coated in faebane and ash. Magic won’t work.”

Scarred hands had grabbed hers, tight and almost pleading. A realization settled over Azriel as he held her steady. A realization that he didn't know what to do with, nor did he ever think would happen.

Almost if he sensed it too Rhys snapped his eyes to Azriel.

Rhysand looked to Azriel’s eyes for confirmation, he nodded and went back to holding her close, unable to think of doing anything else.

It was going to be a long month for Y/n.

Hope you all enjoyed! I got a bit carried away with everything.

Tag list: @rcarbo1 @cherryinsalemverse @kabekusa @hellohauntedturnstudent @optimisticbabydreamer @historygeekqueen @whhyyynottt @love-over-fears @alainabooks143 @ariaaira @snoopyspace @moonlwghts @meritxellao @paintedbyshadows @tiredsleepyhead @annaaaaa88 @willowpains @annamariereads16 @the-onlyy-angie @bbontenswhhore @rahdaleigh @casiiopea2 @littlemissfix-itfic

#acotar #azriel #azriel x reader #cassian #feyre archeron #rhysand #azriel acotar #azriel x you #azriel angst #slow burn

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hajihiko · 23 hours ago

Note

Hi music anon here, I’ll try to keep this short so I won’t go over every little idea and connection in my mind. The song “No Longer You” from Epic the musical crazy reminds me of Chapter 6 when Junko reveals Hajime as also being Izuru. The whole premise of the song is that the prophet, in this case Junko, is telling the protagonist, in this case Hajime, that once he manages to escape being killed and get home, he won’t be himself anymore. He’ll have changed too much. In the musical this is of course more like “you’ll abandon your moral code” whereas for danganronpa it’s much more literal. Hajime isn’t truly himself in the outside world.

Notable lyrics and reasonings are:

“I see a song of past romance

I see the sacrifice of man

I see portrayals of betrayal

And a brother's final stand”

The chorus here can connect to a lot of different aspects of the killing game. Romance = mostly Chiaki. Sacrifice of men = I see this as Peko (sacrificing herself for Fuyuhiko) and Gundham (sacrificing both himself and Nekomaru so the others can escape the funhouse.) Betrayal = Nagito since he did betray Hajime’s (and everyone’s) trust in chapter one, then just kept hammering it in. A brother’s final stand = I actually like to see this one as Fuyuhiko since he considers his life to be “borrowed” following chapter 2. It’s his final stand because it’s, in his mind, quite literally his last chance.

“I see a man who gets to make it home alive

But it’s no longer you”

In this case, this is Junko cheekily revealing that Hajime is Izuru without directly saying it.

“I see your palace covered in red

Faces of men who had long believed you're dead”

The palace in this case is Hope’s Peak Academy. The school Hajime previously held in such high regard. The “faces of men” could be referring to people who knew Hajime when he disappeared, those who didn’t try looking for him or just assumed he left or ran away. HOWEVER, I like to think of this as the people who worked on the Kamukura Project. “Believed you dead” could then be a reference to them thinking they erased Hajime completely in order to create Izuru.

“I see your wife with a man who is haunting

A man with a trail of bodies (who?)”

This can go two ways! First, Chiaki in this case is the “wife.” This would be referring to Izuru watching her die., as this would tie back into the romance line from earlier. OR, the “wife” here is Nagito in Chapter 0, when him and Izuru talk on their way to Jabberwock. It being Nagito would give just a bit more weight to the “no longer you” since Nagito lives and this line is meant to imply in the future. Personally I like it to be both! A verse with dual meaning (and no ship discourse. Hajime can hold many hands.)

That’s all, I’m so sorry this is a massive ask. And if you do listen to the song I hope you like it!

hey sorry I didn't answer for a long time I think I did mention i take a while to get to music asks specifically BUT HEY THATS REALLY GOOD WOW YOURE ONTO SOMETHING BRO

#not an art #My gears are spinning...!!#The song is. Dare I say. Epic? I gotta listen to the whole thing

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nembzz · 8 months ago

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❤️🥲

#very much hoping I'll get my period very soon #i have almost cried many times today because of noce things happening to me #even the ones that happened here😅#1. got complimented on my crochet shirt #2. a person who i have followed a long time followed me back #3. got a nice ask #all of these things have almost made me cry today 😅#it is also my cycle's 33rd day so it is entirely possible by tomorrow i can blame my period #and not have to look that deeply to my mental state 😂

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imagine-nerd · 9 months ago

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The fucking disconnect is so real.

#theo's thoughts #Story time for the people who love reading tags bc I love sharing things in the tags #So I work at a therapeutic day school and this past school year like four school days before Thanksgiving break I was asked a question #The question was if I would be willing to step up and be a long term sub in a middle school classroom #To me this was less of a question and more of a hey we need someone to do this and you're who the assistant teacher asked for #Which cool yeah fine I'll give it a go I really like that person (the assistant teacher who asked for me) and I trust her judgement on this #I was asked and accepted on Thursday. Friday‚ Monday‚ and Tuesday happen. Then three day Thanksgiving break #When we got back from break I was the teacher and it was rough at first and it sure as hell was never easy but I enjoyed it #My formal teacher observation was my boss basically going like so I see you doing all the things and the basis is there #But it's not being followed through on because of behaviors from the most unmedicated classroom I've seen in all my years working education #And now for the summer they're changing 2/3 staff that were in the room and who even knows who the teacher will be (a new hire? Maybe?)#If there truly is a new hire coming in (fed to the wolves immediately btw what a dick move) but that new hire will be the fourth teacher #These kids have had in a year? A year and a half max. The fourth. After the only thing I've been repeatedly told by admin for months #Is that we need to be stable and consistent because we may be these kids' only reliable source of that consistency and stability?#So you're going to have me come in and tell me I've done such a great job and then tell me you're moving me to 'give me a break'#Trauma informed care my fucking ass. I hope those kids raise fucking hell over it.#The brutal satisfaction of watching your own crops burn and knowing that the invaders will starve is great and all but these are kids!#They're barely just about to be teenagers (11 at the youngest and 14 at the oldest) and this is what you're going to do to them?#Yes they can be complete assholes and are often dicks to one another but they're in our school for a fucking reason? I don't get it.#Then two hours later after being told abt the change‚ the clinical director puts me as one of the three main recipients in an email #Saying that there's going to be a new student starting in that room in the summer and the real icing on the cake?#This all happens on last day before summer break. we're out of session for two weeks now and you're just dropping these changes on us now?#God I'm so fucking tired

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moinsbienquekaworu · 1 year ago

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Also. The weird girl in school feeling of both intense jealousy and violent repulsion towards "normal" girls.

#this post brought to you by: the normaler girls i follow on insta and the stories they post #like these three girls. two of them from the same university as me. the other one also french. all in the same city as me #all exchange students at the same uni in england!#but they're going on day trips to london and living their best year abroad #and i'm - what. staying at home and making soup? sleeping and failing to buy postcards?#the warring impulses of jealousy and repulsion.#because. i want to be normal too. i want my life to be simple and nice and easy.#i want to be a pretty girl who's doing it right. i want to have my life together (somewhat) (for my age and status)#i want girlfriends in the straight way who i can have daytrips with.#i long for the simplicity of asking out cute boys and aesthetic study sessions that actually pay off #i am so blindingly jealous of them. they're so much more normal than me. they're doing Girlhood and Womanhood correctly.#but at the same time i would rather die than change so much i'd be that girl #because i am simply not that person. this is not who i am at my core #i do not want to buy startbucks. i don't want relationship drama. i don't want to put all my personal data on instagram #i do not actually want to force myself to fit into the restrictive mold of what normal and socially acceptable girlhood and womanhood are #so i feel both 1) left behind and inadequate like i'm back in middle school #2) but also at peace with the fact that you can't get along with everyone and i'm old enough to find my people now #i mean my housemates are really cool and i have other friends that are also the kind of nerdy weirdo people i hang out with #AND 3) inadequate for general 'i'm a fucking child' reasons #they're independent. they're spontaneous. they're just doing things. they're on the way to adulthood. they're in their early 20s.#what am i then but a child. i don't go out much i don't drink i have this huge aura of no romance #i need structure and plans and i have a lot of inertia #and i thought the adult thing was going well! i'm feeding myself all on my own! i'm planning my days!#i'm doing laundry and cleaning up messes! look at the adult!#she's not done baking but i was expecting much much worse honestly. i was braced for a total crumble #but no we're good. i felt proud of myself #and here i see people having the normal typical year abroad experience. and i'm not #i'm being childish and i'm wasting money doing the exact same thing i'd be doing at home but in england #anyway. 2:30. sleep time. good night #wow i have a ramble tag now

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prettylittlcresources · 3 months ago

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Hi! Quick question for y'all because I wasn't planning on sliding in with a gif pack til I'm on winter break, but I do have this one laying around right now:

#not throwing this in the tags this is for the 34 of you who follow this blog because hi i appreciate you!#option 2 100% will not be until after December 15th btw (my last final is the 13th my brother's birthday is the 14th)#but i giffed him a bit when I was debating replacing my Rudy Pankow fc so i have 185 gifs of him rn and if they'd be useful for #literally anyone I'm down to upload them fast - I'm just concerned with model fc so mostly photoshoots and the amount #that nobody would find them useful and if this poll is 100% nos that's a waste of storage space #like if he was not a cis able-bodied white person I'd just be like fuck it I'm doing it like I did @ my Autumn pack (which fun fact is now #my third most downloaded pack and the fact so many people are using a fc with a limb difference because I went fuck it #I don't care if people use this i love her and I want people to have the option to use her as a fc makes me so happy) but the rpc has a lot #of cis able-bodied white boys running around with way more resources already 😅#honestly @ next pack outside of this random small one is ??? - I'm hoping it's going to be the Alex Aiono one I've been slowly working on #for over a year (that's gonna be over 1000 gifs once it's done ngl) but it might be Melis Sezen in Deha #Autumn Best in the 4400 an update to my Bryana Holly pack or whatever my adhd brain decides to hyperfixate on during my #inevitable Christmas mental health crisis because 'i am spiraling time to gif someone random non-stop for a week straight'#opps now i have over 1000 gifs of them is genuinely a trend for me #going back to writing my essay now. sorry for long tag rambles but hi hope everyone is doing well! <3

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the-physicality · 7 months ago

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welcome to all star. i am officially *adding* my team USA hat to my team phoenix mercury hat

#there was a lot today #putting aside the merc facilities stuff #the orange carpet show #“im wearing a white shirt black pants and black and white shoes”#“my closet's all black” yeah we know #right up there with i used to wear two watches #for the record me? i still wear two watches completely of my own volition #it's important to note that because i have borrowed inspirations before #back to these interviews . me? i knew she was there bc of that large off the shoulder seam in the frame #which for the record means there's more content coming from who idk #they also did not tell her she was going in for that interview oops #unfortunately i also have a handful of shirts that have too long shoulders #but that's bc i prefer the fit of men's shirts and they so often are not in my size #yes i follow that one guy on twitter that's how i know they don't fit #for me it is not intentional you have to call bella hadid #sorry i went on a ramble i've been thinking about the 2 watches thing for a while it's actually been a staple of my personality for quite #some time . actually i went back and forth between one and two bc the second one is a fitness tracker/apple watch #the first went from a digital watch thank you xc to analog bc i realized people complain about it less than a sport watch in pictures #like i said. ramble. my apologies. welcome to my lore

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kbwrites · 7 months ago

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“Who did this to you?” A deep voice echoes, vibrating around the walls of the throne room. On the opulent throne sits the owner of the baritone voice — Ryomen Sukuna. The king of curses, resting his head on his arm as he looks down at you, too scared to look up from your feet.

“I don’t like repeating myself.” He warns, your body hasn’t ceased shaking. Your uniform is tattered, the rips in the fabric revealing deep purple bruises. Uraume was the one that found you, unconscious in the butlers pantry. After waking you up they brought you to the throne room. So there you were, kneeling at the feet of your king.

You arrived to the estate a year ago, your life as a servant was agreeable. Lord Sukuna treated all his servants well. You were loyal, efficient and pleasant to look at, it was only a matter of time before he started to notice you.

At first he requested you be the one to serve him breakfast. Then it became lunch, and suddenly you tended to all his meals. He demanded you for everything, his bathing, dressing. He could do all of these things himself of course, but he prefered your gentle hands. His personal attendant, not even Uraume, had seen the king of curses at his most vulnerable... but you had bared witness to all of him.

“Fine, if you won’t tell me who. Then why?” Ryomen slowly rises from his throne, his looming figure towering over your kneeling body. He lowers himself to your level, one hand reaches down to lift your chin. Firm yet gentle he forces you to look up at him, your eyes meeting his red ones. Your once flawless skin is covered in bruises. His eyes darken.

“They t-think you favor me.” Is all you can manage to get out.

Word spreads around the estate of course. And plus Sukuna didn’t exactly hide his preference for you. You didn’t sleep with the rest of the help, you were given a room connected to his. ‘In case he requested your presence in the night’ but the reality was he slept better knowing you were near. You didn’t eat the servant food, you dined in the great hall. At a separate table he had made for you. All of these things on full display for the others to see, it wasn’t long before the insults started. At first it was the odd ‘slut’ or ‘whore’ being mumbled in passing. Then an accidental shove into the wall, always followed by a curt “sorry”.

But today? It was your birthday. You had only mentioned it to Ryomen in passing one day at breakfast. He never understood the need for such a useless celebration. You went about your duties for the day, when Uraume found you and handed you a small box. And there on display for everyone to see, a beautiful beaded bracelet made from polished cherry wood. A token of appreciation ‘for your hard work’.

A gift from the king of curses.

“What’s so great about you anyway?”

“Lord Sukuna’s bed-warmer gets everything she wants!”

They punched and kicked, throwing you into the pantry. The group of servants you once thought of as your family. Clouded by jealousy, hatred towards you — the lord’s favorite.

Ryomen Sukuna, the epitome of ruthlessness and malevolence, softens his gaze. He looks upon your trembling form with… pity? His moment of weakness is replaced by an unreadable expression.

“You have been relieved of your servant duties. You will stay here in my quarters from here on out.” It’s a demand, leaving no room for objection. Your eyes well up with tears looking up at your king, his other hand wipes them away. He rises, walking towards the door, his back facing you.

“Get up. Uraume will tend to your injuries. Once you are well, we will visit the servant’s quarters. You will point out those who laid their filthy hands on you, and I will kill them.”

part 2 out now!!

#jjk #jjk fanfic #jjk imagines #sukuna x reader #ryomen sukuna #ryomen x reader #kbwrites #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen

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ourceliumnetwork · 11 months ago

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listen. I know my family is bad at communication and acknowledgement of receipt of Thing but when the one thing that consistently happens semi-annually is that I get fussed at for not confirming I received something, it irks me a smidge.

Like if I'm expected to always confirm "Hey I got your [communication/gift]" then why aren't they doing it back? Especially considering the communication in this instance has really actually very important information they will want to know if they want to stay in contact with me.

Like????

Even if I'd just gotten a "K" in response, like. at least it would have let me know they got the damn thing. I sent this email TWO WEEKS AGO and only one person responded - and it was practically immediate too. Like... i know folks are busy, i know shit's going on. I get it. But it would help me feel so much less like I'm suddenly a pariah in the family out of nowhere if like one of the people I'd sent this to had just responded in some way shape or form.

I'd have answered a phone call - i wouldn't have liked it, but i'd have done it. A letter in the mail to my current address even. a message in a bottle probably wouldn't get to me because i'm pretty far from the beaches of the great lakes, and also they're even farther, but like. something right?

my sister at least confirmed she got it and just forgot to respond. i imagine that's what happened with everyone else because we have the same mental illnesses and look. i do it too. but also? also?? i was hounded to respond quickly to things, i was told off every time i wasn't responding within a half hour of any communication. I was asked instantly the next time they saw me if I'd gotten it, even if i hadn't had a chance to see the thing yet.

So forgive me, family, if I'm a little peeved off that all y'all are allowed to "forget to respond" for two whole fucking weeks and then a few extra days (because it's been 2 weeks, 3 days exactly) when i can't let something sit in the mailbox for 2 days because i couldn't get to my mailbox easily while living on my own without getting a phone call or text or email that there should be something waiting in there for me.

*enraged screeching*

#literally the deadline i gave them for my address change was Monday #technically they have until the 8th but i didn't give them that room because i feared they'd use it #and my birthday is this upcoming week and like. idk i was kind of looking forward to maybe getting a card or two perhaps that's silly of me #to look forward to receiving specifically birthday correspondence for my birthday idk man #like i don't have a lot of space to judge i'm also really bad at keeping up lines of communication but when someone sends you #an update with a deadline about when they're moving and to where exactly #and also a big update on a health issue that like. they've mentioned MULTIPLE times #it's generally considered courteous to at least SAY YOU RECEIVED THE MESSAGE even if you didn't have a chance to read the whole thing yet #like????????#angry i am so angry #like yay my sister responded to the text IT TOOK 2 WEEKS AND ME POKING HER ABOUT IT #again i know. i know people are busy and have other things going on #why did *I* have to be the one who came up with work arounds and ways to avoid doing this to other people when no one else does it for me?#why was *I* the one always getting fussed at and told off and lectured about how rude i was for not getting back to people in a timelymanne #but it's fine for them to IGNORE ME FOR 2 FUCKING WEEKS #like fuck *off* with that bullshit i'm so fucking.........#i mean it. about the others. if my grandparents i sent this to and my other aunt don't respond they don't get any more updates on me #i don't tell them when i move next or where i've gone. if i change my phone number again they don't get it.#like. if you're not going to do me the courtesy of saying ''i got your message you sent''#AFTER I'VE SENT A FOLLOW UP TWO WEEKS LATER #then you don't get to stay in touch because you clearly do not care about it.#....i already feel like i'm extremely unwantable and like no one will ever desire to stick with me long term #having the family members i spent the majority of my life being around not respond to me does not help that #the SINGULAR person in a whole list of recipients who responded quickly (and also thoroughly but that was *wholly* unexpected)#was someone I barely got a chance to know when I was young because of weird family drama I don't care about #because it doesn't fucking matter y'all are adults now act like it #like. the most supportive member of my family is a woman i thought disliked me on principle because i was my father's child #and it turns out no it's my dad who's the fucked up one who judged her children just because they were hers #cause he hates his sister for some fucking reason.#when she's genuinely the nicest and kindest person i've ever met in my whole family like???

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livvivviss · 6 months ago

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lazy people probably won't want to read it 🙄🙄 HAHSHDA

How to shift: EMBODY YOUR DR SELF!! ☀️

Fuck the five senses

Most of us always focus on the process of shifting, the symptoms, the 5 senses, overanalyze our process and being very critical of ourselves, we try to analyze why we don't shift, giving ourselves excuses and explanations Saying "I didn't do enough", "I should have tried harder" I wish you guys to STOP THAT.

Actually, none of the above matters. The reason you think the methods, meditation, etc matters it's because of your assumptions and beliefs because you didn't get there and you think "you're doing something wrong" and you ARE NOT, leave that mentality behind and stop seeing shifting as a task or obligation, as something with steps that must be followed to the letter.

Stop and get back to BASICS, When you are trying to get to your DR, stop thinking and focus on "I have to get there" just think that YOU ARE THERE, think ABOUT YOU, about your dr self, who are you in your dr? This is why it is very important that you like your dr's self, and not just an "improved 2.0 me, now with ultra-powered engines" because it just makes you feel uncomfortable, and you need to feel comfortable with being your dr self, You must like being yourself, you must know yourself, dive into your brain and connect with your dr self and with who you're there.

And when you connect with who you are there, forget about everything else, forget how many breaths you have to take, what number you are on, or if you visualize enough, just connect with you, with who you are. By connecting with your 5 senses and with the environment, you are not traveling, I mean this is okay but when you're trying to shift, the shift it's in the mindset, not in the around, it happens in your subconscious, it happens when you become that person, you are becoming your dr self not your environment, WHO ARE YOU? Connect with that person. Start with "Who am I?" "What am I doing here?" "What is my name?" Until it becomes a natural flow, connect with your thoughts until it becomes a natural flow. You did it, you've shifted, when you are fully connected to your dr self and you no longer need to think like your dr self thinks, you are there, and nothing else matters, fuck if "your environment tells you otherwise", It doesn't matter what you see, hear or feel anymore, you are in your dr and you are your dr's person. You know that you're there because of your mindset, enjoy that because that is shifting, that is change, YOU HAVE TO CHANGE, this is manifesting, and manifestation happens instantly when you change your mindset.

The process of shifting doesn't have to take a long time, it doesn't have to take years, the only reason it takes you so long is because you see it as homework. Get out of that mindset, connect with yourself, change your mindset, delate everything else, stop making everything so difficult. "I didn't shift last night because-" STOP, there's no reason you haven't shifted. We shift in every decision we make, when you go to bed YOU HAVE ALREADY SHIFTED, but you are not going to accept it and you MUST accept it.

Why you should embody your dr self (good for lazy shifters):

You should try to connect with your dr self instead of using the five senses or connecting with your dr it's because:

1. It's a bit backwards to try to connect with your surroundings instead of yourself. As I said before, you are not shifting to be your environment, you are shifting to be you, to be your dr self. (Although I'm not saying that using all 5 senses is a bad thing, but you shouldn't focus only on that)

2. Embodying your dr self bypasses all the extra shit about you just lying in your bed trying to shift. The moment you connect with your dr's self, you have already shifted, because if you were not in your dr you would not be able to access the thoughts of your dr self. And when you are focused on this, you are no longer focused on the symptoms and that is the best thing that can happen to you because YOU SHOULDN'T FOCUS ON THE SYMPTOMS because it's not a physical process, physical change comes after the change of mentality. Connecting with your dr self's thoughts is much better than memorizing affirmations and meditating, it's more natural, you enjoy it more and it's less tiring.

3. In the case that your physical environment does not end up changing, you end up connecting with your dr self (THAT IS SO IMPORTANT) you alredy had the mindset shift. And many people when they start doing all this, they start having dreams about themselves being their dr self, and having experiences in their dreams being their dr self, and that is SO GOOD (it's literally happening to me) Taking this post into account, I assure you that YOU WILL SEE CHANGES YES OR YES this is a connecting point.

• Please make this post viral, shifters need to know this 🙏🙏

This was a summary of @shaysplanett's 7 and 10 minute videos. We love her (she was really helpful to me)

#reality shifting #shiftok #shifting #shifting community #shifting motivation #shiftblr #shifters #law of assumption #affirmations #shifting blog #drself #loa #manifesting #manifesation #loassumption #void state #shifting methods

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the-faceless-bride · 8 months ago

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More Ideas for KNY (demon slayer) different characters ♡ (SOME NSFW CONTENT FOR SANEMI AND MUZAN AND MENTIONS OF GORE IN SANEMI AND LIGHT NSFW IN GYOMEI)

<- Part 1

Imagine being dangerously in love.

Imagine being a demon, obsessed with the brash, and blood thirst Wind Hashira. the first time ever being in battle with him is what leads you down a path of want and lust for the cruel hashira.

Imagine going out of your way to always be where he is, always catching his attention and being attacked by him. He believes you're mocking him, following him just to show off that he hasn't been able to kill you. But that isn't true at all. When you fight, you never actively try and gut him, only blocking your neck and leaving the rest of your limbs exposed to be lashed in this masochism tango.

Imagine struggling to hide your enjoyment and ecstacy each time his sword ripped, teard, and scar your body. He had to have known how me made you feel. He must. The darkness of your cheeks must've been a giveaway. Right? His eyes bewitching you in how intense he glares into your soul. It sets a fire under your cold skin, a burning desire.

Imagine one time when you and Sanemi are fighting. Other slayers show up. But they don't instantly jump into the fight. 1. from looking at the fight, you hadn't landed a single strike and seemed to be a greater deal slower than the hashira, and 2. Tanjiro made an odd comment. "Huh, it's like she's avoiding striking him on purpose."

Imagine how Shinobu decided the fight was long enough and tried to sneak in and end the fight. Only for a switch to set off and catch her off guard and spin at the speed of light, leaving a large gash across her body from her left founder to her hip. And Sanemi instantly tried to help her. Only to be stopped by your own weapon pressed so close to his neck that even swallowing made his Adamsapple scrape against a sharp blade. "Don't you dare. Your attention is meant for me. Are you seriously letting her attempt to get between us work?" And that made Sanemi pause... "us? Wha-" -- "don't play dumb darling. We're soulmates, Sanemi~" you whisper to him. "What the fuck."

Imagine how now you make him feel so conflicted, how he hates you for what you are but loves you for how you make him feel... in his home in his spare time as the sun rises, his windows covered and locked tight as he has you on your knees, leaning forward and his chest pressed to your back. Your head locked between his bicep as his other hand held his sword under you. It nicks you each time he thrusts. If he pushed you forward anymore, his blade would surely cut your chest and stomach open. "I HATE YOU, YOU FILTHY DEMON. I DONT WANT YOU. CURSE YOU FOR DEMONIC TEMPTATION." You softy cry at the harsh words from your love, "I don't care if you don't want me... I'm yours right now..."

Sanemi Shinazugawa × Demon reader Trope: Yandere Lovesick/I hate you so much I love you.

Imagine being with Muzan his entire life... your family were servants to his family. And from a young age, you were assigned to be Muzans personal maid or companion as you were too young to really do any work than cleaning up his room. But since you can remember, you've always been with Muzan.

Imagine being the one he confides with most. His fears, his wishes, and despite his coldness. His shouldering eyes seemed to be less scorching when it came to you. His one and only friend. Even if you didn't have much of a choice in the companionship. It was you who sat in on his doctor's visits about his deteriorating health. When he got the news of how it would be a miracle for him to even make it to his mid 20s...

Imagine how one night after a particularly scary coughing fit, he simply places his head to your mid section as you blush his hair and pull it back into a braid. He softy thanks you as he tilts his head to look up at you, "Of course, I'm always happy to take care of you." But that isn't want he wants. He wanted to take care of you. Not you to him. And without thinking, he pulls you down to him.

Imagine His heat is pounding in his chest. You lay across him as his long and slim fingers tease you between your legs. You try and stay quiet, your face twisted with pleasure and guilt. You felt like you were taking advantage of the sick man who would never find love or feel the love of another in such a romantic and intimate way. You thought maybe that this was him just grasping for a moment where he didn't feel so useless being bedridden. But it was so much more. If this was the last thing he did, pleasing the only one who he cared for most. The one he wished he could've married... he would be happy to die. This surely isn't good for his heart, but he couldn't care less. You hovering yourself above him. As he tried weakly to pull you in to rest your whole weight. This was how he wanted to spend his last days, weeks, and months. However long he had left. He wanted it to be with you.

Imagine as days go by, and he feels more and more guilty. He starts to feel as though you let him do these things because you feel obligated as his personal maid to do so. Nights in the dark ask he fingers you, giving and receiving oral pleasure. But you still won't give him everything. You refuse to fully lay with him. Sometimes, he feels like it's because you don't really love him. Not like he does you. Or maybe you find him... pathetic... he can't actually make love to you. You'd be doing all the work. He doesn't want that, and it seems you don't either... eventually, his thoughts become too much, and he decides to let you go...

Imagine you were relieved of all your maid duties, not just to Muzan but to the family as a whole. You were heartbroken. And the heartbreak only worsened at the news of Muzan and his families and your families deaths. You'd cried more times than you'd ever had before in your life. And you were so very confused when you'd found a Man who looked exactly like Muzan sitting in your bed a few nights later. "Hello dear. I'm home." He invented to truly give you what you wanted, and he was eager to give it too you.

Muzan Kibutsuji × reader Trope: Unrequited/reunited love/soulmates

Imagine being Master Kagaya's faithful slayer, you'd always admired him. You and your Master had created a strong bond. Stronger than others. Moments like this reminded you that you were special. You sat on your knees as you just like you had the first time. Your head pressed to his chest and he dragged his fingers over your head.

Imagine trying not to tear up as you remember the first time you'd kneeled for him. You'd been reckless and impatient leading to a fellow slayer getting extremely hurt. You kneeled before him as you sat in the room alone waiting for him to speak. Doing your best to not make any noise as you silently cry. You'd failed him. Your beloved Master. But he didn't yell. He didn't make you feel like you were a problem. He merely hummed before knealing with you, one hand on atop your head and the other cupping your cheek feeling the wet stream of tears and wiped it away. "It's alright. You didn't mean for this to happen. I know you didn't. I know you're a good girl." And your breath hitched. He noticed. And from then on he gave you positive affrimations which encouraged you to do better. For him.

Imagine how as you sat there listening to his words letting yourself flow away and melt into your master. He thought it was innocent. He was simply your master helping you, if it wasn't him maybe you'd find these soft words from Gyomei or maybe even Kyojuro... but he was wrong. So wrong. It was him. Only him. You'd put yourself on the line so much more than you should've. All to hear those soft praises. His wife must not like you... you do take up more and more of his time as days go on...

Imagine how he softly calls to you. Late that night, he'd heard your footsteps. He sat with you talking. About anything that day. Soft and short conversations. Quiet but not uncomfortable. "You're my favorite you know." He sighed, before he let out a small chuckle "don't tell the others." You know he was teasing. But your heart told you other wise.

Imagine being hurt. In battle you were hurt. But even in your pain you still made your way to your master... your beautiful Kagaya... the married man, the family man, that you had fallen in love with. "My dear, you still come and see me while you're in such pain?" He seemed shocked. But you aren't sure why, you'd walk on hot coles and crawled on your hands and belly to kneel for him. You'd do anything for your master. And you could only hope as his favorite... you wouldn't let him down. Finally you lifted your head from his chest, pulling his hands from your hands, leaving a kiss to his knuckles. One day. One day you'll have him.

Kagaya Ubuyashiki × Slayer reader Trope: unrequited love/lovesick/slow burn

Special Part two of Forbidden love with Gyomei × demon

Imagine how the rest of the slayers flock around Gyomei, asking him so many questions. And he couldn't even answer them all. Too consumed by his disbelief that the person he'd fallen in love with so deeply, had turned out to be a demon.

Imagine how he layed in bed lonely and... missing you. He began to long of your cold touch, your voice, your laugh that was so contagious to him. He missed you. He'd fallen for you. Demon or not. He laid in his bed trying and failing to get even a wink of sleep. But just as he had almost fallen asleep he was awoken by a sound. 'Tap tap' was the sound, 'tap tap' on his window. "Gyomei... my love..."

Imagine how he practically leaped from his bed. Demon or not you had carved yourself a spot in his heart. Slamming open the window and pulling you inside, his hands instantly feeling over your cheeks, your nose, your neck. Kissing the knuckles of your cold hands.

Imagine being the one that made Gyomei for a moment stay from his faiths. Gyomei devoted his life to his beliefs, that includes waiting. Waited all his life for the one. Saving himself and waiting. But you both were in a unique circumstances... so from that point on Gyomei promised himself to you. You would stay with him in his home and he would always come back to you. That night he would kiss you, love you, lay you under him while he whispered for you to be his.

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luv-lock · 2 months ago

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⸻ ʙ ᴇ ʟ ᴏ ᴠ ᴇ ᴅ⸻

Pairing: Damian Wayne x Fem Reader Part 2

Headcanon: What if Damien's obsession continue even after you broke up with Dick? What if his obsession grow as he grow up?

Note: Reader is the same age as Dick. English is not my first language. Hope you enjoy!

You never thought your life would look like this. Working in a small flower shop wasn’t what you dreamed of as a bright-eyed twenty-something in Gotham, but it was peaceful. You’d long since left the chaos of capes and vigilantes behind, including a certain acrobat who never could hold onto a girlfriend.

Now, at 33, you felt invisible. Your reflection in the mirror wasn’t what it used to be, and time had stolen some of the confidence you once had. You didn’t mind, though. You had your flowers, your little corner of the world, and the belief that love belonged to someone else’s story.

But then, there was him.

The first time he walked into the shop, you barely noticed him. Just another handsome guy buying flowers for some lucky person. It wasn’t unusual—flower shops brought in romantics, after all.

But then he came back.

And again.

Each time, he would only take flowers from you. If you weren’t behind the counter, he’d wait patiently, pretending to browse until you returned. If you were busy, he’d stand to the side, quiet and stoic, as though he had all the time in the world.

It became routine. He’d show up every Wednesday like clockwork, always choosing something simple—a bouquet of daisies, a handful of roses. He rarely spoke more than a few words. "I’ll take those." "How much for this?" "Thank you." His voice was low, smooth, almost hypnotic.

You didn’t think much of it. Maybe he was just particular. Maybe he liked the way you arranged the flowers. You didn’t dare entertain the idea that he might like you.

One day, as you were arranging tulips, your coworker Hannah nudged you with a mischievous grin.

“Have you noticed how Flower Guy only comes in when you’re here?”

You blinked. “What?”

“You know, the tall, handsome guy with black hair and green eyes? He’s got the whole brooding vibe going on. Like a tortured poet who secretly reads love sonnets at night.”

You laughed. “Hannah, please. He’s just a regular customer.”

“Oh, sure. Because regular customers stare at you like you hung the moon and only buy flowers from your hands. Totally normal.”

You rolled your eyes. “He doesn’t stare.”

“He does, though. It’s kinda romantic. Maybe he’s secretly in love with you.”

You snorted. “There’s no way. He’s probably got a girlfriend or a wife. Guys like him don’t…” You trailed off, shaking your head. “Anyway, I’m too old for him.”

Hannah scoffed. “You’re 33, not 83. And you’re gorgeous. I bet he’s into you.”

You brushed it off, but Hannah’s words stuck with you.

One Wednesday, he came in as usual, dressed in a worn leather jacket and dark jeans. His hair was slightly tousled, and he looked… well, annoyingly perfect, as always.

But this time, something was different. He didn’t just take his flowers and leave.

As you handed him a bouquet of sunflowers, he paused, his green eyes locking onto yours.

“You don’t remember me, do you?” he asked, his voice softer than usual.

You frowned, tilting your head. “Should I?”

He hesitated, a flicker of something unreadable passing over his face. “No. I suppose not.”

There was a long silence, and then he said, “Would you have dinner with me?”

Your brain short-circuited. “Excuse me?”

“Dinner. With me. I’d like to take you out.”

You blinked, genuinely stunned. “I… don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Why not?”

“I mean, you’re—” You gestured vaguely at him. “You. And I’m—” You gestured vaguely at yourself. “Me.”

He raised an eyebrow. “I don’t follow.”

“You’re young. And handsome. And probably have women falling all over you. Why would you want to go out with someone like me?”

His jaw tightened. “You don’t see yourself clearly, do you?”

You laughed nervously. “Look, I appreciate the offer, but I’m not looking for anything. Thank you, though.”

He didn’t argue. He just nodded, took his flowers, and left.

He didn’t stop coming. If anything, he doubled down.

One week, he showed up looking disheveled, his jacket frayed, his shoes scuffed. When he handed you the money for his bouquet, you noticed it was crumpled, like it had been fished out of a couch cushion.

“Are you okay?” you asked, genuinely concerned.

He sighed heavily. “It’s been… a rough few months.”

“Oh?”

He rubbed the back of his neck, his expression pained. “Kicked out of work. Rent’s overdue. Been crashing on a friend’s couch.”

Your heart ached for him. “That sounds awful. I’m so sorry.”

He shrugged. “It’s life.”

You couldn’t help but feel bad for him. Maybe that’s why, when he asked again if you’d have dinner with him, you hesitated before saying no.

But Damien was nothing if not persistent.

Eventually, you gave in. Mostly because he wouldn’t leave you alone.

“Fine,” you said one day, throwing your hands up. “One date. Just to get you to stop asking.”

A slow smile spread across his face. “I’ll pick you up at eight.”

That night, he showed up dressed sharply but not overly flashy, carrying a single rose. He held it out to you with a small smirk. “For you.”

The date was… perfect. Annoyingly perfect. He was charming, attentive, and surprisingly funny. He made you laugh more than you had in years, and by the end of the night, you found yourself wondering why you’d ever said no in the first place.

He never told you who he really was. Not that night, not the next, and not for months. But eventually, you pieced it together.

It happened when you were flipping through an old photo album, reminiscing about your time in Gotham. And there he was. A scowling 13-year-old boy glaring at the camera.

“Oh my God,” you muttered. “It’s him.”

When you confronted him about it, he didn’t even try to deny it. He just smirked, leaned back in his chair, and said, “Took you long enough.”

You stared at him in disbelief. “You knew me this whole time?”

“Of course.”

“And you didn’t think to mention it?”

He shrugged. “You didn’t remember me. I wanted a clean slate.”

You wanted to be mad, but the truth was… you didn’t regret giving him a chance.

By the time he kissed you for the first time, you realized that maybe, just maybe, love was still a part of your story after all.

Part 1. Part 3.

𝒍𝒖𝒗-𝒍𝒐𝒄𝒌 ☆ 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒄𝒐𝒑𝒚, 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒔𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒐𝒓 𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒐𝒇 𝒎𝒚 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒐𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒆𝒃𝒔𝒊𝒕𝒆𝒔.

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snoopyearss · 11 months ago

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When jjk characters call you ‘clingy’

Feat. crybaby-ish!reader

Gojo, geto, toji

Cw: hurt, guilt, angst (if you squint)

This is inspiration from a mini series i read a few days ago by user @fumekara. It was so good, I love me some angst to hurt/comfort.

But i also wrote this from personal experience too, my bad yall i treat this like my own personal diary

Anyway, enjoy!

Satoru Gojo

He was pissed. He doesn’t typically show it much, but when he does, he gets kind of scary. He’s more quiet, his voice gets deeper, and his whole body language just shifts. So when the higher-ups piss him off after a very long meeting, the last thing he needs is someone to pounce on him. He usually loves it when you greet him at the door when you’re home for work. But today, he just wanted to strip off his clothes and hop into bed.

Gojo huffs as he leaves the elevator of your shared apartment and grabs his keys from his pocket to unlock the door. As he opens the door, he sees you in the kitchen grabbing ingredients for dinner. “Hi baby,” You softly greeted him. “Hey.” was all he said back. It confused you for a second because he’s never greeted you like that before.

“Is everything okay?” You walk up to him to try to kiss him on his cheek. “God- Y/n, please.” He grumbled, walking right past you and placing his briefcase on the table. “I’m just trying to help,” you defended, walking up to take his coat off for him. “At least let me take your coat-” That’s when he snapped. Something he’s never done to you before. “Y/n, I fuckin’ got it! Geez, you’re so fucking clingy!” He aggressively shrugged your hands off his shoulder. It scared you a bit, to see him so angry at you. You were confused, all you wanted to do was make him feel better. Were you really that clingy?

“I-I’m sorry.” your voice came out shaky and defeated. Hearing how small your voice sounded in response to him lashing out made Satoru’s heart shatter into thousands of pieces. He wanted to turn around and apologize, but the words weren’t coming out. By the time he turned to face you, Your back was already facing him, preparing dinner for the both of you as tears rolled down your face.

Suguru Geto

It was 2 weeks after Suguru deflected. 2 weeks since he committed mass murder in that village. 2 weeks since he left Satoru, Shoko, and the others. It was weighing on him and you could tell. Nothing but him, his two adopted girls, a few people who believed in his cause, and you.

You promised him you would go wherever he would go, and he was so grateful for it. He loves you deeply and would do anything for you. But some days just threw everything on him at one time, today was one of those days. Monkeys non-sorcerers begging him to exercise curses left and right, Nanako and Mimiko begging him to take them shopping, missing payments from those begging for his service. It was all too much. And the guilt was eating away at him.

He genuinely wasn’t paying attention to what you were saying and it annoyed him how much talking you were doing in his ear at that moment. You were both sitting outside watching the two girls play in the yard. “Y/n,” He interrupted you. “Don’t you have something better to do than to just bother me?” He sighed sounding so condescending. “What do you mean?”

“Must you always cling to me? Isn’t there something else you can do besides following me everywhere I go, at all times of the day?!” His voice raised a bit as if he was talking to a non-sorcerer. “I didn’t realize I was. I was only trying to tell you about what me and the girls did today,” You defended. “You’re always so busy, I rarely get to see you anymore.”

“Yeah, because you’re always underneath me. Sometimes-” He stopped mid-sentence because of the saddened look on your face. His eyes softened a bit. “Sometimes I just need my space.” He sighed. You only nodded and started to walk back inside. “Ok, I understand.” Your voice cracked. Leaving Suguru alone to think about what he had just said to you. As if he didn’t feel guilt then, he definitely feels guilt now.

Toji Fushiguro

Toji was a bit frustrated today. He was cheated out of his money after doing a side job, the bet he placed on the race he kept constantly telling you about fell through, leaving him with zero, and to top it all off, the child support payment was coming up. You being an empath and knowing your boyfriend so well, you wanted to help him any way you could.

He was sitting in the chair by the island in the kitchen with his fingers combing through his hair. He was on the phone with multiple people at once, trying to solve his money issues. “Shiu, you guaranteed me way more money than this! How am I supposed to cover this months child support with this amount?!” You walked up to where he was, wondering what all the commotion was about. “Baby?” You softly called out. You could hear Shiu on the other line trying to calm him down and explain the situation.

“That sounds like a bunch of bull and you know it Shiu, you better have my money by next week thursday or else I’m taking it myself.” He grumbled and hung up the phone. “Baby,” You gently placed a hand on his broad shoulder.

“What, Y/n.” He sternly said. You merely blinked a few times. “I was just checking to see if you were okay. What’s with the attitude?”

“I’m fuckin’ frustrated okay? Please leave. You aren’t helping right now.” He waved you off.

“I barely did anything, I just wanted to know if you needed help with anything-”

“Jesus, I said enough! I don’t need your help. Fuck, you’re so clingy.” His voice booming caused you to remove your hand from his shoulder in fear. Seeing your reaction caused him to think about what he said and how he said it. The last think he wanted to do was scare you. He wanted you to feel safe around him. But with the way you jumped at how he raised his voice, it saddened him a bit.

“Y/n, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-” He was cut off by the sound of his child wailing in the background. “I’ll take care of it.” You said in the smallest voice, not even leaving him time to protest against it and apologize.

“Fuck.”

Part 2

#jjk #jjk x reader #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen #jjk gojo #jjk geto #jjk toji #jjk angst #snoopyearss

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lovscb97 · 4 months ago

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bang chan recs (18+)

key: !!! = personal favourite, s = smut, f = fluff, a = angst

add. notes: hai :3 i know i said i would make a skz recs list but the minute i scrolled thru my likes n started saving from chan onwards, i realised i had Too many recommended fics for him (this list is like 40 fics/drabbles long....) so i decided to just make member separate posts instead!!! i tried not to have repeats of authors to give u guys a broader scope to choose from n also sorry in advance that i yapped so much abt them it's just like . these r my all time fav authors so it's expected. anyways i hope u guys love these works as much as i do bcs they r from some of my absolute fav creators n plz give them lots of love n always make sure to appreciate these ppl <3

. . .

hopelessly devoted to you — @changbunnies (!!!, s, a?)

this was literally a 11/10 fic like i am not even joking rn. i luv greaser chan n even tho he messed up, the way he makes it up to mc is so so soooo sweet. the fact that he's so gone n pussydrunk while eating her out, the sweetness in how he holds her n fucks her is all too mindnumbing n i hope u continue writing bcs u r amazing at it!! i will always come back 2 this when i need a pick me up fr

2. bad idea — @hyunsvngs (!!!, s)

JUNOOOOO my lovely baby.... i adore u n all ur work always but this fic. This Fic. it changed the trajectory of my life. like not even kidding but i was a different person when i started reading this n when i finished it i was Changed. life is worth living now, the grass is greener n the birds always sing 2 me which i firmly believe is bcs of u n this beautiful yummy fic. i fucking LOVE stepdad chan sm like there's smth so gross n nasty abt fucking ur mom's bf n even tho mc is a menace, i still loved it. never stop doing what u do!!!

3. 1095 days — @luvyeni (s)

EX INMATE CHAN RAHHHHH!! i have akshewally been following ur work for so long n i LOVE!! the way u write :3 thank u for always churning out ur work so fast n being so good at what u do. im obv a sucker for daddy kink considering i eat it up every time n it's so fucking good i love how chan cares for mc n the way he gives it to her once he's back. mark my words i will EAT this man up n this fic whenever i stumble across it

4. milk and honey — @straykeedz (s, f, a?)

user straykeedz u have to stop... ur work too addicting n perfect.. ur depiction of chan too real n crazy (/pos)... they're gonna get u... but seriously i love bffs2lovers so bad n the way u always characterise chan n make him call mc so many cute pet names melts my heart :( i've also been following U for a long time n even tho everything u write is so so soooo good, this has to be one of my faves alongside ur inexperienced chan fic. i hope u don't pressure urself too much to update n jus do what u have to do :D

5. my wife — @chrizzztopherbang (s, f)

ngl i Think this is my first fic from u cus i followed u bcs of it n that's a given honestly cus newly turned husband chan?? eating his wife out metres away from his friends n family on the other side of the door n fucking her within an inch of her life right after they're pronounced husband n wife?? i love it i loved their bickering over who's a pervert n i just love the idea of mc finally calling the love of her life hers forever. i hope they r always happy alongside u

6. sweet nothing — @frenchkisstheabyss (!!!, s, f, a)

this fic actually changed me as a person too not even kidding. i EAT UP exes to lovers n the portrayal of it was so good here bcs there's so much unspoken tension between the two n then chan begging mc to not leave again n her promising she won't bcs all she wants to do is be his at last?? AWOOGAAAAA i need him so bad it's jinja michin (i am so cringe sorry..) ANYWAYS!! i hope u know tattoo artist + ex bangchan is a crazy combo n that the makeup sex was HOT HOT HOT!!! plz keep writing i adore u <3

7. pick you up — @moonchild9350 (!!!, s)

see idk if this is tmi but sex where ure being picked up n fucked is downright nasty in the best possible way n i fear i need to get railed like that by chan so u writing abt is literally u making my fantasies come true. this fic was a delicious mix of cute w chan telling mc he only works out so he can pick her up (based off of his bbl texts obv) n hot w him Actually fucking her within an inch of her life. i love all ur work tee bee eich so keep doing what ur doing!!!

8. spring has sprung — @cbini (!!!, f, s)

miss ems where do i even begin with u.. (u probably Do Not Know me but i know u smirk emoji. soz that was weird erm but ya i am the binnie anon who said u deserve changbin LOLZ) this fic was the perfect mix of cuteness w raw passionate fucking i love the idea of chan getting hard bcs ur dressed so preciously in a pretty dress i think it's rooted somewhere in his slight corruption kink which comes out def when u r all dolled up for him. anyways u never miss n i hope u know that <3

9. walking in on rooomate!chan / pt. 2 — @kacciidubs (!!!, s, f)

going 2 be very honest here i do not even remember what happened in part 1 bcs part 2 of this roommate chan fic actually blew my mind away like Seriously user kacciidubs u r insane!!! all ur work never misses n i am always so eager whenever u post bcs i've been following u n loving everything u put out for so long. ofc ur chan work is my favourite as u can tell but this fic... this fic was crazy the switch between daddy n sir oh my god what if i cream my pants rn. plz never stop writing <3

10. last nerve / pt. 2 — @cb97percent (!!!, s)

user cb97percent let me just preface this by saying whatever u write is INSANE. like i already knew u were a great writer but this fic? changed me as a person not even joking rn. the way mc n chan banter n how chan's an asshole who is pissed off how he can't get it up anymore unless he fucks mc is so funny n how the raw passion between them results in the best sex Ever. n ofc the ending w minho took me out n Yea i just . i have no words plz never stop writing to u as well

11. hush — @petrichor-han (s)

sucker for exhibitionism n sucker for chan so what better way to comemorate this occasion than by reading abt it? this entire scenario was so hot like honestly i can totally imagine chan's bitchass doing this bcs he's so cheeky in nature he would lose himself from the thrill of almost getting caught. u r amazing as always thank u for churning out so much content for kinktober may god or whoever u believe in bless u with eternal inspiration

12. daddy!chan helping you shave — @hyunjins-orange-slice-too (!!!, s, f)

i sent u an ask already talking abt how much i love u n everything u write but THIS. this made me weak in the knees bcs i have imagined this very scenario so many times if im being brutally honest. there's smth so sweet n domestic abt the act of helping ur partner shave n with daddy chan in the mix? kill me now plz. the way he asks if he can play w mc once he's done n how he sternly instructs her to be safe like omgkjdfjhjdfgjhhjg need him in ways that give the pits of hell a run for its money w how hot n nasty im abt to be fr

13. one last time — @baby-yongbok (!!!, s, a?)

like i said, i am a sucker for the exes to lovers pipeline alongside husband chan so while this isn't Either of those things entirely it still scratches the itch in my brain very very well. the way mc n chan exchange snarky remarks n how chan only says he's satisfied once they're done fucking OHHHH MYYYYY GODDDD... need this man carnally like i would dump him just so he can fuck me the way he fucked mc in this fr (that is a lie we r locked in 4 life). u r brilliant as always i always look forward to ur work so next time u r questioning if this is worth it just know lovscb97 on tumblr has ur back fr

14. chan ask drabble #1 — @skzms (s)

maymay.. my eternal luvr... the genius behind smrsmf minsung... ofc u were bound to eat this up n end up on this list. idgaf if it's just an ask answer or drabble bcs the way u write is so . so Elegant. i love how u always use ur words to describe the emotion lingering between ppl in love n the way u do it here w chan n mc, the way he reassures her afterwards n how he promises her he'll give her everything later while fucking his fingers into her ohhhh mannnn.. i can just imagine him in his suit thank u for bringing the vision to life fr

15. you're right, baby — @chlorinecake (s, f)

soft dom chan who is ur fiancé fucking u n claiming u bcs he's a lil pouty that u forgot ur ring?? n then going so far to say he'll cum in u to make sure everyone knows who u belong to?? RAHHHHHH HE NEEDS ME!!! this was written so deliciously i loved the way mc n chan cared for each other n also the ending was so cute LOLZ hope they r happy in every universe n that their wedding goes great fr u r an awesome writer user chlorinecake

16. silence — @valkyriexo (s, a)

make up sex make up sex make up sex!!! i love it so good even tho it hurts so bad when mc realises chan forgot to show up :( but the fact that he makes it up to her by begging her to not leave him n making her cum as many times on his tongue as possible for her to forgive him?? INSANITY!! the longing in their eyes n words n actions from how much they've missed e/o when he finally touches mc n oh man.. u ate this up

17. corruption — @goquokka00 (s)

STEPBRO CHAN RAHHHHH i am a sucker for him (in more ways than one iygwim eheheh.. soz) i loved the sinister blackmail u added into the story n how he fucked mc bcs of her bad grades by making up some shit excuse abt learning how to please someone like y/n u can't be this dense girl!!! (i'd do it too if he asked me #Tbh) ANYWAYS. idk how this didn't have more notes bcs it was hot asfk i hope u keep writing more stuff to come :3

18. chef's kiss — @hyuniepies (s, f)

the tenderness of mc n chan's love mixed w the nasty dirty talk ohhhh hyuniepies u r a GENIUS!! this is exactly how i imagine domestic life w chan would be like; him coming back home to u cooking a dinner n then fucking u absolutely silly on the countertop bcs he just can't wait after getting a look at ur figure n bcs he's missed u so much. i too would be obsessed w bangchan if (read: when) he becomes my husband teehee

19. chan ask drabble #2 — @miupow (!!!, s)

USER MIUPOW UR FUCKING BRAIN!! HOW DO U CARRY SUCH A HUGE BRAIN IN UR HEAD!!! DOES UR BACK NOT HURT FROM HOLDING UP THE DELICIOUS IDEAS OF BCHAN SIZE KINK!!! like i told u yst i love ur writing n i love U so bad. u always eat w every request or idea u come up with n i absolutely adore that for u i hope u truly never stop writing bcs u have a serious gift n i hope ppl keep telling u that constantly bcs i sure as hell will <3

20. pretty mouth of yours — @jeongin-lvr (s, f)

need to give chan head like . Yesterday. but OHHHH MEINNNN GOTTTT fiancé channie w mc sucking him off so pretty u know exactly what im a sucker for u dont u user jeongin-lvr? ur writing is tooooooo good i swear i have read so much of ur work n granted this is one of my fave chan works from u icl i love the jeongin ones even more but i'll add those to my innie recs list later :3 ANYWAYS!! plz never stop writing u r awesomesauce (cringe.) n i love u hope u r having a great day today

21. daddy issues — @hwan-g (!!!, s, a)

HELLO THIS FUCKING FICCCCC... it is so good so delicious so fucking beautifully written that it brought tears to my eyes no joke. i still remember the first time i stumbled across it n like wow.. i think i dmed u on my side reading account too to express how much i liked it bcs i rly Did like it truly was a piece of art n sometimes i can't believe ppl like u just write stuff like this for free?? u should be getting paid good money bcs all ur work ALWAYS eats <3

22. closing the distance / pt. 2 — @thefantasyden (s, f)

ik long distance relationships r tough n it's awful when u can't spend time w each other physically or touch either but hear me out . it would Not suck w chan bcs he'd do everything for u the way he does everything for mc in this fic. from how he shows up n is too nervy to kiss her to them finally touching each other for the first time n then she moves back to him?? ohhhh man i love love n i love U for making this ur work always eats n trust that i'll always come back to this fic when i need to rmb how much i love chan

23. riding chan's thigh/knees — @faeryacha (!!!, s, f)

i love daddy chan so bad im sorry im not even gonna hide it anymore n i love the way he was written here too, from the way he asks if mc wants to play to the way he has her fuck herself on him to get herself off like i'm not even into little space like that but the minute he refers to himself as daddy n speaks to me all soft n protective im on my knees on the floor ready to suck him off like my life depends on it. u ate so bad w this plz continue doing more amazing work in the future!!!

24. steamy desires — @notsoangels (s)

shower sex w chan mngnghfhghgh.. need him so bad id let him fuck me anywhere as he pleases but in the shower?? w the hot water cascading over us w just us in our little world like omgomgomg NEED. i love the simplicity in ur writing too n how it paints a picture in my mind bcs i can vividly imagine all of this happening like him making u squirt on his cock n then rinsing u off so u can spend time wrapped up with each other on the bed like plz. One chance plz.

25. the fuckboy next door — @seospicybin (!!!, s, a)

miss seospicybin.. how do u always do it? how do u always come out w the most mindbreaking jawdropping amazing insane array of fics without even breaking a sweat like hello? this series is so fucking good from the smut to the angst that hurts so good. i love the development of the plot n that chan tries So hard to be true to mc so he can be w her n the way she tells him to do it for himself like :( they deserve each other sm i am very much looking forward to part 4!!!

26. pussydrunk chan — @aeliuss (s, f)

mngngngngjghgh i love pussydrunk chan so bad n i love the idea of him being so infatuated w mc that he just Had to drag her away n eat her out. i also love that he's there to support her in the end n how turned on he gets from her just being herself like that is a real man!!! n the way it's so reflective of how chan is irl too? i feel like this is how exactly how he'd behave— needy but so so soo in love with u too

27. kitty — @bandgie (!!!, s, f)

no joke this fic made my pussy throb. i need him 2 do this to him so bad bcs i need Him so bad. the way u wrote the subspace drop n how immersed mc was in her role n the way chan guides her thru everything n then the aftermath of it like hngnngnfgddjghjgh... i always have loved ur writing but this particular piece rly got to me along w ur kinktober series i hope u continue to do writing bcs u seriously so so SO good at it fr!!

28. angel eyes — @temptaetions (!!!, s, a)

this fic. this fucking FIC. bro this is actual evidence of the fact that literary geniuses exist bcs the way u wrote so beautifully not just the actual smut but the whole storyline?? u r a godsend fr like u should be getting paid to put out work of this degree. not only r u a PHENOMENAL writer but i hope u never stop writing bcs this was actually so so lovely n amazing to read i wish i could revisit the first time i read this T_T

29. just (fucking) friends? — @snowyquokka (s)

HELLOOOO i love possessive fwb chan almost as much as i love ur writing!! the way he's so annoyed at how she said they're just friends so he takes out his anger on her but then at the same time asks her what her color is to make sure she's still okay WOWZAAAA.. need him Bad. n in the end when they both agree they don't wanna be just friends like chan.. i don't want 2 be just friends either.. come 2 me plz... anyways very yummy work fr

30. american whiskey — @straywrds (!!!, s, a)

this fic... how do i even begin w this fic... the way u write is actually so . so otherwordly yk? u rly pour all ur passion into ur writing n the way u describe everything like every emotion every detail every feeling it's so raw n real that it touches my heart. i can Feel what each of the characters go thru n the SMUT... the smut is so so delicious ofc. i've read ur other work n u r such a good writer plz keep going with what u do i will always support u fr

31. free use w/ soft dom chris — @hwanghyunjinenthusiast (s, f)

the dirty talk in this.. hngnngkgjjdgjjh. i need free use w daddy!chan just as bad as i need to reread this fic ten times until it's ingrained in my brain n any telepath w the ability to read minds out there is disgusted by how many times i think abt it (idk what this analogy was i am sorry). the way he eats mc out n the way he fucks her omgfkjdgjhjhgjh NEED HIM RAHHHHH u did so well w this

32. play tight / pt. 4 — @roseykat (s, a)

squirting w chan squirting w chan SQUIRTING!! W CHAN!!! the way he makes mc do it once n then immediately goes "yea i need to feel that on my dick" n fucks her within an inch of her life like ohmygodjkdjhsfghj i did eat up the angst too but the way u wrote them fuckinig was so nasty n delicious I ENJOYED IT SM!! this entire series is such a good read even tho it's not chan centered idk if there r more parts to it but if there r plz link me to them!!

33. dream you — @charmercharm3r (s, f)

ok i know we r discussing smut n all n trust that i will get to that but THIS!! this was so cute n precious ohemgee the way he loves mc n takes care of her n banters w her at the start so lovingly is so so precious to me i want him so bad :( the smut was also very delicious w chan switching to hard dom mode n making mc suck him off before ravishing her like oh my god PLZZZZ FUCK ME PLZPLZPLZ u did so well on this plz continue writing more for me at the least <3

34. brat-taming w/ chan — @blurboki (s)

this damn drabble was so.. hngngjfjghjhdgjh. i want 2 be a brat to chan so bad n act out just so he'll snap n put me into my place which is exactly what u wrote n i LOVED IT!!! it's so short n simple (not a bad thing at all btw) yet it's so powerful too? i love the characterisation of chan cus i firmly believe this is how he'd act in bed w a fussy bratty s/o like wow. Just wow. i love u and ur delicious mind i hope u r having a great day just for this :3

35. tell me all about it.. — @chnsbm (s, f)

hngnfjhdfsjghgjh the idea of chan making u forget all about ur stress n playing with u to help u sleep is so gfjfjjjffjhgjhjh HOT!!! the way he lovingly reassures mc like u don't need to worry abt it now just let me take care of u n how he's such a fuckin TEASE!! w the way he's touching her is so so hot u ate w this idea n i will forever die on the hill that this is really smth chan would do— tease u n make u talk while he's doing ungodly things to u just to see u stutter over ur words

36. be that guy — @daizymax (!!!, s, a)

i have said it once i have said it twice n i will say it one more time bcs i don't care how many times i need to reiterate it needs to be said: EXES TO LOVERS W CHAN IS TOP TIER!!! the smut in this was so delicious but the LONGING chan had for mc.. the way he felt the twinge in his chest for letting her go oh man.. i'd take him back if he so even looked at me but maybe im just crazy. BUT ANYWAYS!! this is possibly one of the hottest chan smuts there ever is so thank U for this delicious gift fr

37. more than just friends — @kwanisms (!!!, s, f)

werewolf chan my luvr... my big strong baby who will knock me up w his knot n fuck me until the sun rises RAHHHHHHHH!!! this was so so SOOOOO good n yummy like from the way he pinned mc to the wall to the way he ordered her around n how his self restraint snapped the moment she called him daddy like why's that so Me behaviour HELPPPP anyways user kwanisms u fucking ATE w this i hope ur pillow is cold every night u go to sleep <3

38. connected — @j-0ne25 (s, f, a)

let me just start this by saying I FUCKING LOVE U USER J-0NE25!!! ur interactive stories esp megaverse r so fucking good how r u so bigbrained my dumbass could never like actually JSDHJFJHGJH. anyways i rmb reading this very vividly n oh boy.. "baby patience, or do you need me to teach you a lesson?" Brother my panties r drenched n off dont even start w me rn. anyways this was so so delicious plz never stop writing i beg u

39. chan ask drabble #3 — @hyungszn (!!!, s, f)

saved the best for last but CLOVER.. (u dk me but i am ur biggest fan hai :3) "your mouth is saying no but your body is telling me a different story, mrs. bang." GRRRHJDJSDFJHKJSFKJSFKJGJ... I NEED HIM SOO FUCKING BAD!!! the way they banter even while having nasty sex n just love each other so bad n hello my breeding kink went feral w this. when mc asked him to not eat his cum out of her pussy n he was like "and why is that?" cus he wanted to hear her say it GRAHHHHH I WILL EAT HIM!!! on a side note, u r so so soooo amazing i have been reading ur work for so long i think since american pie n i can safely say u r one of the best skzblr writers i have ever seen along w so many other ppl like plz keep up the good work bcs i will ALWAYS support u for it !!!

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add notes: thank u very much to all these amazing writers fr. if ur work wasn't featured here now do not fret!! i probably (most definitely knowing my dumbass) just missed it cus i didn't scroll Very far down in my likes (there's like 2k+....) so trust that u will most likely end up on the next recs list!! i love u all very much regardless if u r here or not n as always a very big thank u once more for all ur amazing hard work, u r all doing so well n i hope u guys know that <3

#✰ sunny's skz recs!#bang chan #bangchan #bang chan smut #bangchan smut #bang chan fluff #bangchan fluff #bangchan x reader #bang chan x you

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